Can't really say it here, never told to anyone though. Sometimes it keeps me up at night..
Let my retarded friends burn a barn
didnt stop cheaters in cs go, now its too late :(
So you would have -1 friends in total? :o
lol it's that easy to get syringes in Brazil? scary shit man
I was like on a vacation but with a lot other kids from all parts of the country, in our group we had this fucking anoying kid, so fucking anoying, like the nerdiest possible kid, but in his words he was a badass, so this dude had a disposable cam, yeah i'm a 90's kid, so we used those at the time, like 2 days before the trip\vacation ended, i took a shit and took photos of it with his cam, and took dick picks wiht it as well. I remember he said that his parents wooped his ass all the time for no big reason at all, so in the last day when we were saying our goodbyes, i told him, dude i took photos of my dick and a big dump i took, you should have seen the fear on his face, he basicly told me his father was going to beat the shit out of him.
Felt bad for a minute, than i remember he was a total douch to me all the time x)
didnt drop a wep for a teammate
sniffed friends sister panties
when i was 7 or something me my brother and some friends were collecting pokemon cards even tho we didnt know how to play them lol
we once met a chinese guy who was like 1-2 years older than me and we traded cards and kept on meeting at a playground next to a friends house and one day he said he would undress, piss on a slide and slide down if each of us would give him like 10 cards lol
never went to that slide since that day
I stole about $360 from my dad when i was little and spent it all on toys
I replied to this shit thread
Post a legit comment on hltv
i bet 8$ on NiP and they lost to fucking clan mystic on nuke
Punched my dad in the face.
I threw a snowball at someones window and it was a rock covered in snow, broke the window and no one ever knew
Like I said the last time this was asked; killed a guy. That's something you carry with you for the rest of your life. You can't take it back.
My sister told me not to eat the last cookie but i did it anyways
I hit a kid in the face with a brick. He was never the same again. I do feel terrible about it when I think about it sometimes. I mean I was only 16 but that's a hard thing to leave your mind.
Smashed a guy's head with a beer bottle then proceeded to break his arm.
Getting stoned, walking around town when we went into an open, covered parking garage. There was a car window open with a tarp hanging out. We lit our joint, then lit the tarp and walked to our buddies place to go chill and smoke more weed. When we left 3 or 4 hours later, we were stopped by the fire department saying someone told them they saw us leaving the parking garage before the fire. We pleaded ignorance and they let us go. No idea what happened to the car, but there were 2-4 fire trucks and 3 cops cars at the scene.
I slept at my friends house and pissed in his bed.
I stole a hamster from a pet shop because they wouldnt sell it to kids under 18 years old... later on I went back and stole a partner for it.. Looking back at it im glad i didnt get caught who knows what would have happened :D
Pulled a gun on a cop lmfao
why the fuck did you have an actual syringe as a kid
Broke windows and stuff like that :D
Used wallhack in matchmaking to make russians mad.
I broke up or burn lot of shit and I had lot of fights, I never lost one btw. But once we were in a big stove with some friends and I said "What if I pick a fathom with my hand for a while" because I remember seing a picture of some dudes barefoot walking in fathoms, so I did it and when it started burning me I threw it a way and it accidentally fell in the neck of one of the guys and I truly burn him out, now he has a humongous scar in his neck for life, he didn't talk to me for like 1 year even tho I said sorry to him lot of times, so every time I see him I feel really guilty and bad of the idiocy I did, I keep seeing him and the relation it's getting better but.. Still, I was an idiot.
My advice is that you should not play with fire and actually hear to what your parent say, don't be a pyromaniac idiot like me.
can't share illuminati secrets
i pissed to my schoolmate bottle and the limonade was yellow (orange juice) so i thought it was a nice idea :d i just wanted to do funny things whole year , i had big problems..., She was my neighbour :D , good old times :D
Joined this retarded comunity
Allmost lost my left nipple during summer while swimming.
Was in a pond somewhere and we we're jumping off things and I fel on a iron thingy with my chest from a few meters height.
People on shore came to my rescue and brought me to the E.R.
My niple was like hanging with a tiny piece on my chest.. allmost completely ripped off except for that one piece still holding on :D.
Niple got 50+ stitches and it still shows to this day.. some 11 years later :P.
I broke up with a girl over text. I feel like such a cunt for it. I've apologized many times to her and we remain friendly, but I still feel awful.
I stepped in water with my socks on
ohh the horror
Beated one motherfucker to coma for trying to (sort of) rape my grill. Don't regret it
This threads are comedy gold! keep the storys coming boyz!
Another fucked up thing i did:
When i was like 13, wwe was booming in Portugal, so me and my friends did those shity tricks all the time for fun, after gym class, one day, we were already geting dressed, and we had this dude this vilage boy in our class, that had a femenin voice, so we kinda picked on him a lot, so i dressed up, and decided to put him on a submission move, "Walls of jherico", and as i did it, one of my friends came from the shower, and threaten to hit him in the face with his dick, and i told him go for it lmao, he did, the kid went running away from classe with his arms open like a girl. Althought i didn't actually put my own dick in his face, i feel bad for holding him for like a minute lmao
Matted my arse hair with chewing gum, dressing up as a used sanitary towel one Halloween or stealing a bike off a tramp so I could get home faster after a night of drinking.
please don't judge me tho but I never robbed anyone..... I know, I know....
Got the neighbor's chicken and throw fire on it's head using alcohol.
I was using short arm cast. Did all this and still recorded the scene with an iPhone.
Man I got a few.
Let me think.
Firstly, I had bird flu in China. Literally slept 10 days straight with a 30 minute break inbetween to drink a 2L bottle of orange juice. I had a fever and was sweating like fuck [it was 40 degrees in Wuhan at that time.] Anyways my friend takes me to the hospital and the woman says you need an injection. I said cool, and rolled my sleeve up. Ah no, in my ass. Er...ok I thought. Looked around and the room had no door on it and there was windows on 3 sides with people walking back and forth on the street outside. Then I realised I've worn the same shorts for ten days straight and sweated in them. At this point I was hallucinating from the flu and just took my shorts off, but as soon as I did the fucking smell filled the room. Shitty sweaty smell and it just stank of sweat. The nurse didn't even move her eyes and got the job done. And a few people smiled and waved at me as I was bent over taking this injection in my ass cheek.
The other one was probably the worst. I was invited to work in Morocco for 3 months [hated it] and on the first night we went to this strange city 80 miles away because they had a club and whores. The boss drives me and we get smashed on vodka on the way there in the back with my new coworkers. We get there and I swear the clubs had a monkey smoking shisha at the entrance, and midgets as waiters. As I went in it was like Persian music [the stuff moe would listen to] and a load of prostitutes around the bar, and just loads of sofas surrounding different tables. I bought 2 beers and it was 36 euros.Anyways, my friend says 'this girl likes you!' She looked...ok. And I was like damn! So I said yeah I'll chat to her. Anyways after 4-5 hours of me not speaking French or Arabic and her not knowing English we all went to leave. My employees talked to her and gave her money and she told me she was 23. Anyways it later turns out she had a 23 year old daughter. We get to this strange Moroccan house, 5-6 guys and their 'dates' for the night. I get the top room which is just a load of blankets on the floor and no ceiling. So we get down to it, remember I just got to Morocco. And I actually fucked this Muslim prostitute up the ass whilst the 4:30am call to prayer rang out. I felt awful. I lied I was a muslim and she realised after I still had my foreskin. Oh well.
Poisoned weed I sold to give bad reputation to a dealer (because she was a fucking scammer and the woman is a rapist).
I probably killed one person, I don't even know.
my friend and i were walking in a forest at night (3am)(a woman got murdered in that forest), we heard some weird noises, saw a guy with a hoodie passing by in the forest and we started sprinting back .
masturbated in my dead grandmas rocking chair
when i was rly young i got one of those cheap gumball machines from the dollar store and put a frog into it and killed it...
smelled my cousin's panties she'd left in the bathroom
Went into an ice cream shop when we were like 12 or 13 and the 3 of us shit all over in the bathroom, on the floor, on top of the toilet and in the sink. still can't believe we did something so retarded lol
for the moment nothing yet, i was pretty nice and quite as a kid, but i'm only 18 yo for now, i might fuck up in the future.
read number of threads on hltv that i shouldn't have. This one included? kek
I used to burn ants with matches or lighter. They were like "aaohh. and burnt in 1 sec"
forest and house fires. ez
First time I switched my car's deck from winter ties to summer ties. I drove on the highway the day after and I felt something strange with my car. I stopped away from traffic. The moment I stopped I heard a sound "donk!" and one of the car ties went off and traveled across the 100 km/h drivezone in a slow pace. I was so fucking lucky nothing happened.
i wiped my ass with a potato
after bar, i was waiting for a taxi in a line, then an asian girl appears. I saw her before at the club i was in, so i smiled at her, she smiled at me. i asked if she wanted to go to my place and she said yes, so we went. at my place we started fucking pretty fast. 5 mins goes by, and she gets up from riding. only to discover that my dick is very much red (she had a period). then i said to her that "well, since my dick is already red, why not make it brown?" and then fucked her in the ass. after i came, i decided i want to sleep and threw her off the balcony and never looked down. dunno if she died or what.
When I was 5 or 6 I threw a hammer at one of the neighbor's kid's head, because we played cops and robbers and they never let me play as CT. He was taken to the hospital, but he only had stitches done.
Me and a couple friends pissed in an empty bag of chips and threw it at an old woman. Prob the edgiest shit i've done.
When i was 11 and my sister was 10 we slept in the same room for a few weeks than it happened for fun i go naked to scare here or something i cant remember it exactly but she got also naked and said i shoud lick her nipples because we saw that before and she laughed while i was doing that after that i go sit naked on a chair and she is gonna sit above me but we were young and idk how to do it and than it didnt go in and me penis hurt because she just sit on it than we heard our parents and we stopped very quickly and go to bed
i was 18,had some friends over,we were watching a movie,and downstairs neighbour called the cops, beacuse it was too noisy(wich it wasnt true,and it was like noon).He did that regularly whenever i had friends over he'd call the cops,make up something and id have to explain it to them for half an hour that i didnt do anything wrong,so one day i have had it with him,and early in the morning like really early i took a shit infront of his door,and latter when he got up to go to the store he stepped in it,i could hear him rage and shout,it was the most satisfying feeling in the world,although i still regularly piss on his flowers from my terrace and they keep drying up :D xD
Saw the train coming but crossed anyway, never felt so stressed with all the air horn, the sound of the train breaking etc
I could have used the tunnel but it would have taken me 30 sec and I would have missed it
I missed it anyway since I ran to avoid the bill :3
When I was younger (around 15 yo) I have been experiencing with explosives and smoke-bombs. I have many great stories with them, this one is about how I was cooking a smoke bomb.
I have had one great recipe for a smoke-bomb that I have found on the internet, I have tried it for couple times before and it worked perfectly. Once as I was cooking this massive smoke-bomb for 4th time I have decided to spiced it up with food dye, as I have read somewhere on the internet it supposed to make the smoke colorful. Short story long, smoke-bomb unexpectedly ignited right in our kitchen (yes, I was stupid enough to cook it at our house), blast hit my face. My face was partially burned same as my eyelashes and hair. Our 2nd floor house was mesmerized by the dense smoke in a second... I saved our cat and coughing, I ran to our garden for fresh air. As a result sideboard and cooker hood had to be changed. No one was injured except my burn face.
Stay out of this stuff if you dont know what are you doing. Peace
Cashed falsified checks twice from a bank and stole some money too once... was on drugs and desperate with no conscience at the time, had no money for even food.
punched a girl on the head when i was 12 years old
I fapped outisde and let a old lady watch me do it
When i was in bolivia watching female midget wrestling i got high on cocaine and fucked 2 midgets but one had a dick and tits and the other was pure female but she liked to have shit rubbed all over her so i shit on her face.
Terrorizing footwears of my condo residents.
This is too much.... i can't really tell it.. :/
6 year old, playground with friends, found big rock, see kid on top of slide, throw rock at him, hit his head, he passed out
Best thread on hltv! 10/10
lol i got arrested for impersonating a muslim on my school's facebook page everyone freaked out and called the police, i wrote "close the doors at 1"
i started playing csgo
after that i don't have life
trying to believe pro scene doesn't cheat
I wrote a thread in HLTV
It was nasty, nasty.. Nasty!
I was sick and 15 but my mom forced me to go to school no matter what.
I hid in the bathroom and had a really bad case of diarrhea and sat there in pain and agony while people outside my stall had to ask occasionally "are you ok?". I wasnt ok but I grunted mmhm.
And then for some random ass reasoning I decided to masterbate right there in the bathroom stall. To make sure I wouldnt have to clean the mess I shot the load into the toliet and sat there for the rest of the school day wondering what I have just done and smelling an awful concation of semen and liquid shit.
And yes I forgot completely that flushing it was an option.
I haven't done anything even close to what people here have done cuz my parents told me to respect other people
we used to wrap arms around this retarded chick in our neighborhood that we fed LSD and yell NIGHTMARE NIGHTMARE NIGHTMARE NIGHTMARE
Made out with my science teacher when i was 14 and she was 25.. :D
i've dropped my awp to a ruski ;(
I've always been a good kid
I masturbated in a classroom, oh fuck, it's not good to feel warm sperm inside your pants
I was on a vacation in Greece and there was a forest nearby the beach. So I was playing in the forest and found matches in my pocket. I lit up a match and threw it on the ground and I quickly stomped on it so nothing happens. I was playing there for about 30 minutes and then my parents called me telling me we had to go to our hotel because it was getting dark outside. I forgot that I threw a lit match on the ground and I went to the hotel. When I woke up I heard firetrucks and there was smoke everywhere, as my parents rushed me out of the hotel. As an 8 year old, I couldn't care less, but later I realized that I burned down a forest, 2 shops, and a hotel. Nobody found out.
fought and severly injured a chicken that later died from its wounds. I was in love with wwe and was like 8 year old FeelsBadMan
When I was in prison I thought it was cool to wear your pants lower than you underpants.
Im in a wheelchair now.
Had a relationship with a beautiful girl named Rusti who was a year below me from year 10 until yr 12 without having sex even once,when we were both virgins.
Even tho we did other sexual things & such,there was private reasons why losing her virginity scared her,much like other girls.So i stayed with her for 2 years because i absolutely fucking loved her & we were a great couple. (Because for all you preb kids out here,There is more to a relationship than just fucking)
Even while this was happening i was getting heaps of interest from other girls.
Then a couple months after we split she fucked a guy 3 years older than her which i knew.Not a friend,but i knew him.
yeee got fucked over pretty hard with that one ay Boys,
now 18 years old & still have my virginity.
Even miss her to this day,
Life's a cunt.
I crossed the border with Poorland.
Made an account on HLTV...
scammed a guy on ebay
feels so bad now...
I ate a snake, a fucking snake
showed my flag in the mainland
I voted for Donald Trump.
fucked my mom on cocaine while drunk while my sister was watching
On the 4th of July me and my cousin put a frog in a cup and put a purple smoke grenade in there with it and it turned purple and we left it in the grass and the next morning it was still there
accepted the terms and conditions without reading them.
faped on balcony tho like 10+ ppl saw xd
i played around with a canister of fuel and then had the idea to light it up because i've seen it on tv. was pretty intense flame instantly and i ran away. luckily it didnt explode and my neighbor was able to kill the flames with a wet towel.
unfortunately i always did stupid things like that and they knew it was me this time too.
Flying a commercial airliner into a building.
I pissed on me at 13 years old .It was a tough winter
And i killed a chicken while laughing like a maniac
after reading this topic I realize Sweden is a terrible country with freaking kids like Australia
maybe need more muslim there
I was like 9 maybe 10 and me with my sick crew were going on lunch. We had lunch in other building that the school was at, and it was really snowing heavily back then. Buses had troubles going on such a snow. We hid behind a big pillar - 1 guy was IGL and he scouted incoming buses, me and other 4 were hid behind the pillar with giant snowballs ready. our scout spotted incoming bus. As it was coming next to the pillar, we all threw snowballs at drivers window at the same time. The driver panicked and almost crashed the bus.The bus nearly crashed, made 4 trams stop for a long time, and few cars also. The driver and some his friend jumped out of the bus and started chasing us. We went full sonik- running like a usain bolt and meanwhile throwing snowballs to slow him down. After a quite a long chase he gave up and called the cops. We had no troubles
9/10 would try it too
I bet on iBP vs NETCODE Guides :((((((((((((((((((((
5am after Party McDonalds, told off Duty Police Detective i destroy every Cop 1on1 for no real reason, 5 min later all of the cities Club Bouncers stormed McDonalds and kicked us Out
Yeah, pretty stupid but funny memory
When I was 8 me and my friends played tag in the dark in a friend's room, I accidentally destroyed his bed and as soon as we turned the lights back on I pissed off.
When I was fifteen I felt like a cool kid because I illegally climbed up cranes, radio towers and shit like that, then once at a party I had the glorious idea to hang of a 20m crane after having drunk 5 beers. Luckily I survived but looking back at it, it was really fucking stupid.
Killed a cat and then buried it.
i gave some crystal meth to my grandfathers beer
i taken shit to the bath, when i was totally drunk XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD i dont remember this :D mom told me at moring that i should check what i left in bath
gamble too much.
PS: skinlore .top 10$ free code:kryp
When I trick my gf into delivering a briefcase to a supposed business contact, the once-carefree student that I knew was abducted by thugs who intend to turn her into a drug mule. She is surgically implanted with a package containing a powerful chemical, but it leaks into her system, giving her superhuman abilities, including telekinesis and telepathy. With her former captors in pursuit, my gf seeks out a neurologist, who she hopes will be able to help her.
TLDR: Gave my gf superhuman abilities and fcked up her life
Stole 8 prepaid phone cards right in front of the cashier with a buddy of mine... to abuse a bug in a free2play FPS which allowed you to deposit 40€ with fake data for free :D
Played with a ball with some friends when I was like 8yo, friends left and I was alone, sitting on the ball, waiting for someone else to go out and play with me but noone came [kids would usually come and go at random time], I got bored and suddenly wanted to take a shit really really bad, so I just pulled my pants down and started shitting without realizing I was shitting on the ball, even worse it was half liquid half hard. Obviously I no longer wanted to have that ball so I carefully picked it up and threw it inside the window of my neighbour. The next day, he was so mad he literally had that ball in his hands and walked to everysingle neighbour, showed them the ball and asked wether they know who did it. And then, the same day, on the evening he came to our house with the ball, mom opened the door, called me and that cunt neighbour said that some kid saw me throwing the ball inside, my mom was so mad at me and told me to apologize 10times, it was so annoying and embarassing I was so mad at that cunt. Next morning I went outside, shat and pissed on a cardboard and threw it in once again. He soon came to our door and I was done for. Literally everyone shouted at me so hard. We moved to a different house a week after. Basically we moved because of my 2 shits.
I downloaded a car and 8gb ram from the internet
When i was 7 yo, i accidentally burned the gym down. they had to pump water from a little pond. the whole village smelled like fish..
I sometimes cum on cups and glasses in my house and then just wash them so my family drinks on them
Chased my friend around until he smashed his face into a pole. I lol'd. =D
I let my sister find my fleshlight on purpose
cheated on my gf, never could find anyone like her since then, only hoes now...
I live in small village in Poland, when i was like 10yo i was very afraid of cocks, there were like 5, and 4 were friendly in the farm. 5th one was allways agro to me and i was scared of going outsite alone bcuz of him, but 1 day i did it.I went out solo and this motherfucker attacked me as usually so i picked up stick which was nearby and punched this bitch like 4 times in the head ... well i killed him xd I was afraid of my uncle being mad at me bcuz of what ive just did so i burned him to hide the evidence (my granda was burning some trash that day so i just threw him into that fire) XD
Just another day in a life of polish 10yo XD
Picked up a mini hotdog off the floor and put it in my friends water, and he choked on it.
can't talk about it, don't want to get in trouble =p
burned down my table at our school's chemistry labo ; it was our torch that was still on fire and i stupidly put it on the table instead of turning it off /facepalm (i got kicked from that school due to this and had to search for a new one half through the year)
one day as stupid 8 yo americano i was just walking around my neighborhood and i see this moderately sized dog, it seemed nice so i picked him up and brought it to friends house, eventually stray dog got rly mad at friend cuz we were playing rough with him and bit my friend, the dog had rabies and my friend ended up dying, this story was all made up because nothing interesting happens to millenials cuz we sit at home all day and do nothing, hope u liked the story tho <3
I thought I was about to hear sum good shit and feel a little better about myself, and all I get is stories about pranks and accidents. I feel even more estranged now.
it doesnt count, you didn't do it...
Thaught that USA as a country had logic.
Pissed on a public pool when I was 5 .
wow i actually scrolled down to the bottom
Took a shit in a public swimmingpools garbage can :DDDDDDD
Was 12 back then (y)
I throwed rocks at cars when they did not stop to let me pass at the crosswalk .
I accidently threw scizzors in the middle of the class(dunno even why) and the shit landed on some dude's head and he was bleeding like hell , nobody knew who it was .
Me and a bunch of other friends did something stupid I don't even recall it , but when we got caught I immediately denied my part and all of my friends got punished except for me.
I provoked a disabled dude to fight me, and then proceeding to wreck him.
I had a teacher in grade school which really liked me since I was smart and quiet and w/e , at the ending ceremony she tried to approach me, I didn't even handshaked her.
I once decided I no longer liked some dude , so I straight out ignored him for like 3-4 months and made all my friends do the same , his crying and beggings didn't help him until I was satisfied enough.
stole a pack of wotsits from the supermarket when I was like 8 or something
ate 2g of mj when I saw police car
that was fuckin cab
i started matkrig in bamba
Jerked off in a forest
Was alone and bored so :/
Well its not fucked up but its super weird..
I saved a girl that lived on the same street as me when i was Young.
We were at the local lake and she was older then i was Think she was like 12 and i was 7 or so, anyway she got her hair stuck under the bridge we were playing under and she almost drowned if it were not for me janking her hair loose.
About 1 month later i got a new bike and thought it would be a great idea to ride it down the biggest asphalt hill in the neighbourhood and crash into a car cracking my skull..
According to my mom, that girl i saved from drowning also saved me by finding me Before i bled out..
Kinda fucked up aint it? if i didnt save her i would be dead too..
my and my friend showed our asses to some kids in a window and their mom came out screaming and chasing us but we were 2 fast 4 her and got away.
Had a bet that I could lick a bar of soap, put it in my mouth choked and accidentally swallowed the soap. Next day I was shitting soap and bubbles.
Peeing in waterpistol and then shooting my friends with it.
ples don't tell anyone.
I licked a girl after my friend had fucked her, but i didn't know about it until it was to late.
She was sucking my cock in the bathroom so i was gonna be nice back, then my friend told me he just fucked her :(
threw my friend a pack of cigarettes while he was on his balcony but they landed in the gutter. didnt wanna buy him new ones so i went onto his roof to get them back. needless to say i almost fell down but it was kinda fun nonetheless :D
When I was 4 I went to McDonald for the first time in NYC and it was one of the large ones with 3 floors. My father went on line to get the food while I sat down on a table nearby waiting for him. Then a saw a kid who had a Gameboy and was playing Pokemon Green and I immediately went over and sat next to him. I was with him for about 10 minutes or so but when the kid left I realized I was lost and tried to look for my dad and screaming his name. Then an old lady tried to pick me up and ended up slapping her in the face and she got mad and walked the other way.
My father came and told me that he was right across the restaurant and I felt better.
10/10 no regrets slapping that old lady.
I threw my dog from a +2 meters wall for pure morbodity (I was 4 or 5 ages old), she had 2 legs broken.
I other situation (dont remember age, maybe 8-9) I threw a frisbee in front of a passing car, my friend's dog was hit in the face, but the car slowed down wen the woman saw the dog going to her, so the hit was not hard
Now that I look back I thing I was a quite sick kid, I love animals now and even respect incects lifes. I was very racist too, in a innocent way, probably because tv
i couldnt stop laughing during my grandmothers funeral, it was uncontrollable.
You must have more than 25 replies in existing threads or newsposts before you can post new threads.
We apologize for the inconvenience, but new users signing up is responsible for most of our spam.
Does this mean people have to reply to me, or do I need to reply to other people.
Touched my penis with my female second cousin's vagina when we were 3-4-5.
I believed flusha never cheated
When i was a little kid (5-6 y.o.) I ran around in our garden playing, minding my own business. All of a sudden i spotted a small bird in the corner of our garden, just sitting in the grass. I decided to see if i could "catch" the bird. I expected it to fly away when approaching it, but it didn't so I jumped on it (feet first) with full force and almost killed it. I was SO surprised it didn't fly away so I just ran inside and pretended it never happened. I felt so bad for that poor little bird. It was suffering and crying :( I realized it was probably injured beforehand since it didn't fly away. :/
About a week later I overheard a conversation my mum had with our neighbor three houses away, she was extremely upset that her pet bird was missing and basically told my mum to look out for it. I then knew what i had done... So i pulled myself together, went out to the corner of the garden, picked up the dead bird body and threw it straight in the trash can to clear the evidence...
I was such a bad kid xd
Teased a monkey at my local zoo with a banana and then spat on him, i felt bad after.
I think its name was fallen or something like that.
Bought a Fanta by mistake when I was supposed to buy a Coca Cola can, so I poured it out in the sink.
fucked random girl from croatia in tent right next to my best friend:D
Burned my freind with 3degree, Shot my same freind with a 22c in the leg.
Fought 3 cops at once, 3 months in jail. And I fucking managed to crash a brand new bmw m3 in 2009 with 4 girls in it, 70km/h. All this stupid things was while being influenced on Xanax, valium, Whiskey and a few opiates. Oh, lord.. I have grown up :) Gives me chills thinking of it, could have ended deadly :/
When i was five years old, I was throwing sticks on the road for whatever reason while i was waiting for my friends mother to come outside and take us to the shops. As i threw one of the sticks a car came speeding past and the stick i threw went directly into his window and nearly caused a car accident. He got out of his car and started screaming at me and i said "ok".
Oh and when i was 9 years old, me and my neighbor played a game called "feral truth or dare" and she dared me to show her my dick, so i did and then she showed me her puss. We did this a couple times and her mum eventually saw my little dick.
I fell in love with a girl, got friendzoned. Now I've fallen again :')
Christmas eve. 15 y\o got a new phone from my parents. The first thing i did after packing it up and getting it started i sent an sms to my girlfriend and dumped her with ending "wish you a merry christmas". That one i do regret, because it was a very low thing to do.
I once was a fan of Immortals, but then I saw ESL One Cologne 2016 qualifiers.
plz polish i not speak london
Was on a camping trip in Sweden with my family and my gf when I was 16 or so.. At night we decided to go for a walk because of beautiful northern lights. I told her that we should have sex outside, to try something new. She agreed, but we couldn't find any "safe" location, so we broke in to a little cabin that belonged to the camping place, and had sex in the bed there. We did not have condoms and she was not on the pill. So I just came in the bed. Good memories. Still together though, 6 years later.
I guess the next guests in that cabin were happy rubbing themselves in my cum.
i remember many things but one i remember so good was that i were throwing rocks with my friend. just passing rocks by hand in long distance and then accidentally i throw this big fucking rock (size of ice hockey puck) to his eye. from long distance it sounded like that he were laughing so fucking hard so i started to laugh too, then i came closer to him and he were actually crying so fucking hard that whole neighborhood heard it. for 3 months he had very big black eye (left eye if i remember) and he told to his friend on school that he got beated up hard but sametime he almost killed the guy who made it (talking about me lol)
I was stoned and just finished watching the latest episode of one piece.I decided to find another anime series to watch so I went on to some forums and people kept repeating boku no pico. I searched it up but since I was too stoned, all I saw was semi-hentai so I thought it must be similar to high school of the dead. While watching it I was pretty horny so I decided to masturbate. before too long I came not realizing the main character was under the age of 18 and had a dick. GGWP.
Banged my girl-bestfriend while my other best friend was playing PC next to us
removed some ribs, so i can suck my dick.
I once tried to suck my own dick
Tried to argue with Thooorin, he still believes he is smart because he replies to retarded reddit comments.
I started betting with 100 bucks on a jackpot made it up to 600 bought my friend a 100$ knife then lost all of the 500 I had left and then my friend bet his knife and he lost it too so now I have no skins left ; (
Me and my friend were playing in the sandpit at school, it was a pretty big one. I was using a shovel for digging, obviously. But I wanted to put the sand in the Bucket which my friend was playing with. He refused to give me the Bucket so logically, I hit him on the top of his head with the shovel. The hit knocked him out and left him with a concussion. We are still friends.
My friend found a glitch on hes bank account, he was able to transfer money to skrill while bank balance stayed the same. so we transfared money to steam for 3 days,(then it got fixed orsmt).. everyday a max stack, dont remember if it was 600 or 1000 back then.. afterwards we felt guilty and thought were really fucked now. But still nothing has happened, it was like 2 years ago. pretty sick tho
damn so many interesting stories, i wish i could read all.
Climbed airplane. Get this thread to 1000 comments!!
fucked one of my best friends girlfriend, don't blame me she was hot as fuck
tried putting my dog sucking his own dick
dunno why thats why its fucked up
Fucked my best friends girlfriend
Which was my sister........
I banged my gf on the bed when my other friend was playing ranked on Dota2
asked my fiance to fuck another guy in front of me
probably will happen soon...
Climbed a tree and threw eggs into buses during the rush time. I was 8 and it was funny at the time. Feels ridiculous now.
1) in elementary school(I'm americano) there was this black kid that played Pokémon just like I did at the time. We came up with the idea to arrange a time where we would meet up and play a match 1v1. I went and that cunt never showed up. My little self was so mad the only revenge I could think of was taking my holographic Pinsir Pokémon and fucking rubbing my sweaty prepubescent balls all over that thing. I Shoved it in my bookbag that night to give it to him the next day and oh boy the look on his face when he got that card from me was pure content, but in the back of my head I knew what I did and held back my laughter meanwhile he was touching and examining it so closely.
2) also as a kid, was chilling in friends backyard. We were board and he had an old matress thrown out beside his fence. Since it gave some nice cushioning we thought it'd be a good idea to jump of the fence onto it, after a couple times (since his fence was old) A NAIL FUCKING SLICED THROUGH MY LEG. I ran across the street back to my grandmas house where they were all panicking wondering what to do with me. Ended up getting 11 stiches and a wicked big scar above my knee which im looking at rn
The most fucked up thing was probably letting refugees in my country.
Every time i masterbait after i cum i keep watching the porn and think what the fuck am i watching
i fucked my moms milf friend
yea.. she was hot but it's not like in porn movies.. i wouldnt do that now
My friend was desperate to lose his virginity seeing as everyone else in our friend group had already lost theirs, so I asked my sister to have sex with him. She agreed and now they are married.
I will not write it here... its too weird lol
I got drunk and broke some windows
ok this is long-
me and my friend was out doing nothing (14 y/o). it was a working station at the junior high were we went to school. they worked to renew the whole school for alot of money. we went to the school 11 pm. and went to a working "bracket". Inside it was a key hanging on the wall. We both tought it was an universial key to the whole school. And my friend picked up a rock and throwed it at the window. We got the key and tested it at the school door. It worked to the outdoor. We went in. we tested the key to the teachers office. And got in. We took all the money from every class savings for their vacation. We got in to the principal office. it was a safe there and we found the key and took all his stuff. it was a video cam, a gold watch and some personal stuff there so we filmed the whole event. we went out and to another school (primary school) went by the roof and inside right into the teachers office and found alot of money and another safe at that school principal safe. got out. we went to our school every night for two weeks (this was our last year at junior high and got like a month left) so we changed our grades to be straight A students right away at our teachers office at the comp and printed it out (we were both failing almost every class from before, and never went to any class the last year). the last night the alarm went off when we was there. it had been there all the time, but suddenly went off and we ran away outside. next day at school ppl was shocked and told us it was a burglary last night there. we acting with it for some days. they changed all the doors at the school. it went 2 more weeks and my friends parents found the whole tape and whatched all the things we did and broke the tape and gave the key we got to the principle and told him it was us. he reported us to the police. we agreed to not talk and admit to the police in forhand. when it went down at the police station we sat in our own room with our parents for 4 hours straight denying. they told us they got finger prints and evidence of all we did and the their dogs hunting us up 2 min after the alarm went of and they knew where we was heading, but could not understand why they we didn't get caught, but their dogs went the way we come from and not were we ran away. after 4 hours getting flame we both gave up and told them. and they would not quit they wanted more names. because what we did was not planned by teenagers and was "professional" planned out. since they did not get any clues for almost a month. we did this without thinking, but we got a ticket for all doors and lockers for the whole school at the price of 10k$ that we had to pay, but with our underage lifes we could not get that punishment. so it faded out with the law. they did not find out that we changed our grade and got in to the primary school and we went off free 14 y/o with about 15k$ to split and straight A students (got in to everything we searched for). i feel bad for the vacations we broke for about 10 classes. so when i think back it was a fucked up month. but a good story.
I've had a wank in class 3 times now lmao
I will never tell anyone.
pissed in my sisters pillow, scank never saw it cuming
I gave my friend a condom that had a hole in it and you can probably guess what happend next
When I was like 10-12 yo and were on summer holiday, me and my friends used to build peashooters by cutting a finger of a rubber glove and taping it to the end of a hollow plastic pipe. So even though we kids were on holiday and the schools had already ended, many people still went to work. And we knew this great spot where there was a really dense forest next to a street and a bus stop on the other side of the street. So we would get up early in the morning and hide in the forest very near to the street and shoot the people standing by the bus stop, waiting for the bus to take them to their work places.
The poor people were very sleepy early in the morning and we were well hidden so they didnt realize where they were being shot from and they just kept embarrasedly glancing at each other and tried to act normal and act as no one wasnt even shooting at them. We had many good laughs just looking at their facial expressions as they tried to see where they were being shot from, it was apparent the situation was very awkward for them :p
Here are a few things I've done:
- Fucked my best friends gf while also in a relationship with my gf at the time for 2 years; had an affair basically, aka the coldest most fucked up type of cheating.
- Smashed my recent ex's $900 iPhone on the ground into 100 pieces when we were together (I was drunk and she had punched me, had just gotten back from clubs that night). She was crying and begging me not to, but I was livid. Smashed it once.. then picked it up and smashed it a second time in front of her again for good measure... god damn was it satisfying. I ended up paying her back everything for the phone. I cheated on her too; but for other reasons.
I'll chime in with few more later.
raped and killed a girl in 1990.
when i was 15 i took my parents car, picked up a friend and we drove through the city. we did that several times, during the week just before the summer holidays. we even went once to get some kebab at 3am. good old times.
sorry i love these players but it is obvious they are cheating. The suspected players always lock onto people through walls whereas the legit players never do. It isn't coincidence, it happens far to often.
the most obvious ones are:
too bad valve will never actually investigate it, coz it would make their game look shit if everyone's hacking. they will just keep relying on VAC, which will never detect a 64bit private cheat -_-
Had a diahrea attack during church and splatter poop all over the Windows...
SiEGED | CSGO Genius
sorry i love these players but it is obvious they are cheating. The suspected players always lock onto people through walls whereas the legit players never do. It isn't coincidence, it happens far to often.
the most obvious ones are:
too bad valve will never actually investigate it, coz it would make their game look shit if everyone's hacking. they will just keep relying on VAC, which will never detect a 64bit private cheat -_-
It wasnt me but laterearlier this week we had graduations from primary school (9th grade 15-16y.o)
And there were there 5 guys who stole a car, were driving it with no license obv. Crashed it and one guy got in the hospital because he was driving on the car's roof. 4 of them got minor problems like shitloads of money to pay and the guy who were driving got criminal sentence and will prob. go to underage childrens jaul xD
This is pretty bad:
When I was 17 (5 years ago) I was pretty famous on some kind of social networking website I'm not going to name. That was before chicks got suspicious about sending nudes cause there had been no fappening or that many major nude-leaking stories.
So there were a lot of chicks following my account and fangirling, and I'd get them to get naked on Skype. (Still have a fetish for girls getting naked on camera because of those days)
Now one of the chicks, who was also 17, was smoking hot. We had a "skype-date" arranged, so I was like "I need to save this somehow to fap to it later" and downloaded a screen recording software. I recorded her getting naked and masturbating, the whole lot.
Because she was really hot, I wanted to share with my friends so I uploaded it to some pornsite without owning an account on it, which was fucking retarded. I messaged the pornsite to get it taken down because she was underage as well, but to no avail. I didn't have an account on there so I lost any control over the video.
The result is that there's a video of that girl still circulating around the web and I literally still come across it sometimes on different pornsites. Who knows if someone that knows her found that video and completely rekt her life. Her parents were really religious Americans so her life might have turned into hell.
Really feel sorry for that crap now, just cause I was a stupid ego-tripping kid that wanted to brag about female attention.
sucked on my best friends sister's boobs while he was sleeping in the next room LUL
Cheated on my gf like 50+ times (I don't even remember every girl I fucked, so maybe more, idk). We are together for 6 years now I love her, we are even planing family together... but sometimes I just want to fuck new woman. Every time I do it, I feel bad and tell myself this was the last time and I'm gonna quit this shit... but, oh well... I can't help myself
some kid (3 or 4) year old won 40euros on machine and just left and i took his money, he didnt knew he won. kinda lame but yeah.
stole 200 pounds worth of money from my mum's credit card thinking she wouldnt notice,she is single mother with me only and working night shifts to provide for us,this was like a year ago but i still feel fucking terrible abouyt it and our replationship has never been the same :( i dont get stuff for my birthday etc anymore and she just doesnt trust me that miuch feelsawfulman
i won 1000$ in a roulette site from 5 cents and i lost them in 3 bets ;-;
lol the lies on this just to feel good.
anybody who says anything about sex = lie little virgin FUCKS
trust me you don't wanna know about me..
I offered a guy 1 key to post a thread telling everyone to dislike some German shitkid's video. that's not the worst thing though... I didn't pay him the key :OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
things i still feel bad about and think about:
once i kicked a mole because i thought it was a rat (i'm dumb). poor mole, it dindu nuffin.
when i was a young kid i kept two goldfish as pets. when i think about it now keeping fish in fishtanks is cruel. like i never did anything with them. they probably died because i or someone else forgot to feed them. sad.
traumatised some girl (for a while) in secondary school. she was fat. she kept slipping while trying to walk up a wet grassy slope. there was mud all down the front of her white shirt and her school blazer. i laughed my ass off at her, then i shouted for everyone to watch till i called like 60 people to watch her keep falling and we ALL LAUGHED at her. she was crying and i never got in trouble.
i done more, but that's all i'm willing to admit.
climbed on rooftop of school when i was like 14. we had hammers and broke the roof and shit (we were dumb as fuck). police showed up, and i started running. little did I know they brought k9 dogs, the dog ran after me and bit me in the arm and leg. i was only 14 though, so i didnt get punishment except for my mom spanking me to hell
I forgot about the worst part, I always wanted a bunny when i was young, but my parents wouldn't give me one. So I stole one that was running around on a grass, don't know if it was owned by anyone or wild, but I brought it home. I was so scared that my mom would find out, so over night i locked it in a chest that I had over night. When I opened the chest, the little bunny was dead. I grapped it in a bag and threw it in a trash can :(((((((((((((((((
give RIPenglando a cookie