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HELP ME GUYSS
Russia HltvBestUser 
Ok so I'm pretty new to this whole dating thing, theres this girl I really like in my math class and I wanted to be her boyfriend, theres these really cool guys in grade 9 and they have sex about five times a day, they say that girls love it when boys show them their penis. So in my next math class I stole a seat next to her and stared at her boobs, I became erection and pulled it out through the fly of my pants, as I was about to tap her on the shoulder so she could see my penis, this other girl that has no boobs and is ugly screamed "oh my god!", screaming and pointing at my penis. I stood up to tell her to shut up and go away, but my penis was still hanging out from my pants, all the class was looking at it, I didn't want them to see my penis because it meant I would have to have sex with everybody in the room. I tried to make things right by swooping over to the girl I like and bringing my penis up to her face close up, this made it clear that I wanted her to see my penis and not the rest of the class. She screamed and tried to stab me with a pen, but she missed and stuck it up my bum, it felt really good, and some weird clear goo shot out from my penis and hit her in the face, she ran out of the room crying and I got sent to the office. My penis was caught in my zipper, so I had to leave it hanging out there for a while longer, but then classes ended and everybody entered the hallway, everybody saw my penis, and I now have to have sex with the entire school. I don't understand what happen, why are ufly girls so nosy, and why did the girl I like run away? Is my penis very small, I do not understand.
2016-07-18 22:18
Topics are hidden when running Sport mode.
Show her your wand before you do anything.
2016-07-18 22:20
2 replies
I did but she ran away crying
2016-07-18 22:21
1 reply
Their parents probably promised her to some other family before she was born. She cries because she can't have your donger.
2016-07-18 22:23
TL DR
2016-07-18 22:21
1 reply
TL DR : showed dick to everyone including my crush and now I have to have sex with everybody in school. Help me :(
2016-07-18 22:22
#5
dumau | 
Germany felo
Well, you have to fuck everyone in the school now, then it should be okay.
2016-07-18 22:22
6 replies
But i only wanna fuck my crush and not everyone in school :( help me pls
2016-07-18 22:23
5 replies
#16
dumau | 
Germany felo
Well theres an easy awnser: Just show her your dick again, because that way you reset the number of people you have to fuck to just one person, your crush. It's a very old trick by the ancient KFC Chicken Nugget god Bill Gates.
2016-07-18 22:29
4 replies
But my penis is stuck in zipper and i open zipper to find out penis is cut in half. So in a hurry i pasted it but in the reverse way :O and it wont cut again so i can paste it in correct way :(
2016-07-18 22:34
3 replies
#20
dumau | 
Germany felo
I know that problem. Just make yourself into a women then. Because that way you can be lesbian with your crush and you dont have to fuck everyone because you dont have a dick.
2016-07-18 22:36
2 replies
you knew this problem which means you experienced it? :D
2016-07-18 22:37
1 reply
#24
dumau | 
Germany felo
Yes i changed my gender 3 times by now, and the best thing about it is you just have to say it and your wish will be grantet by the forbidden monkey god, transgenderbenderfendersplender-god named "Snoop D O Double D".
2016-07-18 22:43
why post such thing here? its like posting in /b
2016-07-18 22:23
1 reply
hltv is best help. Thats why i posted here
2016-07-18 22:25
raported wrong category
2016-07-18 22:25
4 replies
All this happened while teacher was explaining how to play csgo. So its same category. pls halp me :( :O
2016-07-18 22:27
3 replies
get a big car so every knows you have a big dick big car=big dick
2016-07-18 22:28
2 replies
ty my friend i sell my kidney to buy 3rd hand car :)
2016-07-18 22:28
1 reply
n1 buy dikke bmw
2016-07-18 22:29
I expected this story from sweden but not from a Putinov, unexpected.
2016-07-18 22:30
1 reply
ok taz
2016-07-18 22:32
#21
 | 
Macau Lass3YAOW
Learn english and I might understand :-D
2016-07-18 22:37
3 replies
lmao its good enough to understand. dont blame me if u cant read
2016-07-18 22:39
2 replies
#25
 | 
Macau Lass3YAOW
w0w did I hit a nerve?!?!?!
2016-07-18 22:47
1 reply
nt
2016-07-18 22:55
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