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Poem challenge
Austria NotAvailableAnymore 
As you guys know I like to write poems (see my bio). I thought it would be fun if you gave me random but simple topics and not inappropriate either, so I can write a quick poem about it. Thank. Have a nice day
2018-10-11 21:26
United States Snake2k 
Can you make one for me
2018-10-11 21:27
Stewie2k won a major now he's called a traitor. He left his team, then his fans left him, they said with mibr he will never win. He tries to proves them wrong, he always believes, he will never give up until there is one more trophy he lifts. The major might have been a fluke, but his career isn't, when he was young he said he'd play for cloud9 one day, but no one listened. But here he is, look at him, top NA player, playing under the name of a legendary team. Snake2k, fan of mibr, but maybe you don't like stew, but it doesn't matter, he's here because he ignored haters like you.
2018-10-11 21:56
2018-10-14 19:36
2018-10-11 21:59
gore | 
Austria TheVirgin 
I have depression, but that's alright I will just go on the best web-site brings a smile to my face. For memes, autism and baits, this is with no doubt the bestest place. Forget about YouTube, Twitter, pornhub and such. Then to have a good time, you don't need much. You just need to be creative and then you wait. In just a few seconds people will start taking your bait. Some say 0/8, but they're really just mad. That they didn't get the juliano nudes, you said you had. I got #1 comment, mom I did it. But then I cry as the admins delete it. I go back to baiting and offending random users. Then I am better than all these 12 year olds and fake flagging losers. I read the comments on some of these threads. People so aggressive, they're almost like threats. Everyone forgets what HLTV is really all about. Making threads about fixing teams by taking one out. Sometimes I ask questions, because I am not the best. Will this setup give me good fps? Lost my cash, fuck this team. Gonna hang myself from the ceiling beam. r8 girl, oh look it's just bait. Do you think girls use the r8? Despite all the memes and funny baits. My favorites are the useless debates. No matter how good your proof, even if recorded. I'll quickly dismiss it and you're reported. Many unique threads daily to read, but [+18] gifs, is all I need. HLTV has some great people too. The ones who do translations and math homework for you. HLTV is like a family, I say holding back tears. Now that this thread is made, see you all in 10 years.
2018-10-11 21:28
no_one | 
Latvia shds 
quite beautiful. 8/8
2018-10-11 21:31
wow, that's the best poem I have ever seen (definitely not my poem)
2018-10-11 21:33
gore | 
Austria TheVirgin 
yeah thanks. (definitely my poem)
2018-10-11 21:32
gore | 
Austria TheVirgin 
you stole it from me
2018-10-11 21:34
xDDD you're funny
2018-10-11 21:35
You Austrians are weird people.
2018-10-13 09:27 Definitely the best one , LOL =D I remember this one
2018-10-14 19:40
Xyp9x | 
Other Zyncc 
2018-10-12 09:42
gore | 
Austria TheVirgin 
2018-10-12 10:01
BnTeT | 
Australia reeeee 
+1 amazing
2018-10-12 10:32
2018-10-12 13:04
gore | 
Austria TheVirgin 
i konw
2018-10-12 16:22
United States Acehavok 
I cried. BRAVO good sir!
2018-10-16 07:45
2018-10-16 14:50
wow this was the best HLTV poem I ever read!! you wrote that???
2018-11-27 18:48
2018-10-11 21:28
WAIT A SECOND, you already asked for this poem D:<
2018-10-11 21:34
2018-10-11 21:35
I want a new ?
2018-10-11 21:37
Germany Cyasera 
Yes (NAA will need see this comment, not a bump)
2018-10-13 09:37
I did, but he's not getting a new one
2018-10-16 07:42
Germany Cyasera 
Stop finding my bumps! (bump)
2018-10-16 14:56
Ok men
2018-10-16 15:09
gore | 
Austria TheVirgin 
another one i just made: three letters, one word, that gives you permission it explains itself with high precision. the opposite of it is called no, if someone says that just let it go. yes means yes and no means no, if you don't agree with someone, just let them know. yes is a word you usually want to hear, unless you're asking someone if they're going to kill someone you hold dear.
2018-10-11 21:36
xD nice lul
2018-10-11 21:38
gore | 
Austria TheVirgin 
2018-10-11 21:38
gore | 
Austria TheVirgin 
pls answer my question in your other thread
2018-10-11 21:39
Lithuania andy_ 
Roses are red VP is dead (created a thread like 5 minutes ago OMEGALUL - )
2018-10-11 21:37
Germany Cyasera 
I'm just gonna bump this thread, cause you asked me in chat.
2018-10-11 21:41
I didn't ask you anything in chat, wtf cyasera, why you lying about that? But when I really need you to bump a thread, you're gone, pretending you already went to bed, those aren't the qualities of a real friend. But I forgive you, you're a cool dude, when it comes to being nice to people, your track record is good. Keep at it, so you don't get banned, if that happens, well my threads'd be damned, who will be there to save my threads from becoming irrelevant then. Oh wait, Mr_Fuccboi does a good job too, when you are not around. But not as good as you. Sometimes he pretends to be my second account. Bumps keep the thread from going away, so your bump is welcome anyway, thank, just do it more often and have a nice day.
2018-10-12 07:25
Germany Cyasera 
these keep on getting better somehow xD. bump btw.
2018-10-12 08:03
Thank men, I appreciate
2018-10-12 08:04
Read #20
2018-10-12 08:05
Germany Cyasera 
I got to say very low quality for your standards... Which still means top 0.00001% of content on this site xD. Stewie2k did nothing wrong btw.
2018-10-12 08:08
Aw okay
2018-10-12 08:08
Germany Cyasera 
well still great I'm just saying I prefer most others you wrote ^^.
2018-10-12 08:10
Ok ok
2018-10-12 08:11
Germany Cyasera 
Is it really ok though? ( not a hidden bump)
2018-10-12 08:41
Of course it is, and of course it isn't
2018-10-12 08:45
Germany Cyasera 
Man I really have to keep my bumps more hidden (so totally not a hidden bump).
2018-10-12 20:53
2018-10-12 20:53
bump (2nd acc)
2018-10-11 22:01
2018-10-12 07:26
write a poem about vp
2018-10-11 22:16
What r u think about #20?
2018-10-12 06:51
read #25 too xd
2018-10-12 07:27
You should also read #55
2018-10-12 10:16
Denmark Twick_ 
Write a poem about how the Netherlands became a superpower
2018-10-12 08:04
I would like to try but when I look at HLTV right now, all i see is ADMIN MARTIN and his "your mom looks beautiful when she squirts". Ill find this topic and screenshots and post them here in a minute
2018-10-12 08:07
Denmark Twick_ 
He is such a children
2018-10-12 08:13
I like him. Maybe 5 years ago some1 was doing cs 1.6 HLTV games everyday and I played with Admins alot and Martin was funny. Maybe childish (it was long time ago) but still funny. And You could talk seriously with this guy at any time and he would be 100% serious. Weird guy but not a douchebag :v
2018-10-12 08:19
Poem bout me. Cya men
2018-10-12 08:18
I don't know who are you are just a random dude, and wtf is that name? That confused me too. I really don't want to write a poem about you, I don't know much about what you do. But this is a challenge and I will deliver, Every poem was nice, but I think to you I'll be meaner. Why you ask? Well, I don't know either. The topic you gave me is hard and I really don't like that, but guess what I can still write a poem complaining about that. Doesn't have to be about the topic you gave me, If you think I'll do what you want, you're crazy this is my my thread, I do what I like. I don't know if you'll like this, but I think you might. Rhymes in my poems fit better, than a couple that has been 70 years together, Rhyming is so easy for me, you should be glad I do this for free, those two sentence rhyme , but I can also do three, you think I can't do four, just wait and see, oops, I did it, I told you it's easy for me. But I am not that good, still have much to learn, but not right now, I am busy. I better go back to work, where there is money to earn.
2018-10-12 10:22
men :( i am the georgewashingtonstealsnames gay inb4: "idk who u are xaxa" nais poem bay da way
2018-10-12 12:00
Of course I member, you're really edgy
2018-10-12 12:04
2018-10-12 12:04
bump cuz you have gained unlimited respect for the hltv poem
2018-10-12 08:24
Czech Republic Limacool 
Write about Styko please (but in a positive way, don't hate him please :D
2018-10-12 08:48
He has a couple of trophies since 2017 he's one of best Slovakian players the world has ever seen, he might have low stats because he plays support, but he's certainly anything but a bot, unlike other players, that don't do much that only hold angles, get simple frags and such, he can also clutch. Mouz replaced him because they thought it would make them the best, the did reach a final, but after star-ladder they are full of regret, they might even consider, putting him back on the team, but imagine how he would feel, getting kicked and then get let back in. I'm sure he wouldn't mind, he'd put personal feelings aside, do everything to win one more time and make sure that kicking him again doesn't cross mouz's mind.
2018-10-12 09:44
Czech Republic Limacool 
that's awsome, ty mate
2018-10-12 09:43
2018-10-12 09:44
Czech Republic Limacool 
If you have instagram put in in instastory and tag him there, he sometimes replies
2018-10-12 09:45
I aren't have Instagram
2018-10-12 09:46
Czech Republic Limacool 
rip :(
2018-10-12 09:46
Finland Nuori_sergej 
Xarte teaching everything about life and csgo to aleksib
2018-10-12 08:54
chrisJ | 
Finland Motori 
Jovik ChrisJ Thorin
2018-10-12 09:48
Norway v0dzilla 
Roses are red, Violets I adore, Become avaliable soon, NotAvaliableAnymore
2018-10-12 10:26
Denmark AircraftPilot 
I am a terrorist with a simple lifelong dream To plant a C4 bomb with my 5-strong team So I got in a queue and waited my turn Till it was time for my match to confirm So as the game loaded in I shook with anticipation Until shrieks of 'cyka' destroyed my feeling of elation For to my dismay I'd been matched with a clan Of russian patriots who were stalin's biggest fan So as the warmup ended they declared 'RASH B' Their microphones obnoxious and loud as can be But as they stood in spawn with the timer counting down On the clan leader's face there began to form a frown He glared into my eyes with his crosshair on my head And asked me if I'm russian, for if I'm not I should be dead But as I replied 'da' I knew I was in a trap As him and all his mates started spouting russian crap And I didn't understand a word so I just stood there and waited Knowing when the round started I was going to be baited When I found myself alone in tunnels I knew I'd been tricked But as they rushed out long their leader got picked So they all crouched in pit with their A rush dream shattered Not to mention their comrade, whose brains had been splattered Then along came an enemy with aimhacks and walls And the russians screamed 'CYKA, THIS GAME SUCKS BALLS' So they abandoned the match and I was left all alone With a team of dumb bots who were sadly quite prone To rush CT spawn with a bizon SMG And I thought to myself; That's enough CS for me.
2018-10-12 10:29
Very nice
2018-10-12 11:45
Denmark AircraftPilot 
old copy pasta from reddit :D
2018-10-12 11:46
Ah, I aren't know much Reddit
2018-10-12 11:46
your poems are shit keep sucking your mamas tit dont take it the wrong way i have sex with yo mama and sister on my birthday you can call me your new stepdad but ima send yo ass to facility if you behave bad
2018-10-12 10:40
:D nice
2018-10-12 11:44
Denmark Holo3 
Wow you're awesome! Can you do one about the fact that there is only 2 genders?
2018-10-12 11:00
Stick or a hole, there isn't much more, gender is determined by chromosomes. XX and XY so why, do you try, to tell us there is something beyond that. 2 genders is what there has always been, stop making up genders, you can't just be, what ever you want to be, people can think for themselves you see, so stop telling them what they should think. You can be crazy by yourself, but stop going around trying to change facts, most people telling you your opinion isn't right, but you might dismiss them if they are white. Tired of extreme leftists, blaming anything just because is it the way it is. Read some books, or at least stop being aggresive, every video of a leftist hitting someone, on youtube is bound to be massive. Just because you're on one of those doesn't mean you're famous at all, it's just there for people to see how you fail at life. (I think this one was bad)
2018-10-12 12:09
Do one about Astralis and how good they are, please.
2018-10-12 11:02
Xyp9x | 
Other Zyncc 
originally penned down by me just now: CS is a game of mouz and cat I aint coldzera I never bait Olof is a legend who plays like a champ Draken is a bot who loves to camp Niko is having the best aim & VP doesn’t know their game. When flickshot of kenny gets to work It makes opponents’ nipples perk Cloud9 is having winning issues Krimz is already lacing up his shoes ChrisJ’s awp moves like a sword Can some1 check flusha’s keyboard Scream is known for his crisp headshot Let’s kick stewie cuz he chokes like a bot I don’t know about the rest But u shud admit that Astralis is the best. S1mple is a player who is loved so much Xyp9x is renowned as king of clutch All the tickets of major are sold Cuz cs is never gonna get old.
2018-10-12 11:25
Xyp9x | 
Other Zyncc 
its not completely about astralis.... just to include some diversity :D
2018-10-12 11:29
Very nice :D
2018-10-12 11:46
Xyp9x | 
Other Zyncc 
Thnks lol i didnt know i could write poems.. when i read this mind started making rhyming connections...i enjoyed writing these poems..but they are basic...still they r fun.
2018-10-12 11:48
Yeah :D
2018-10-12 11:48
sry, but ur poems so basic and low quality
2018-10-12 11:31
it's fine
2018-10-12 11:45
liTTle | 
CIS Dowa) 
Lukas Bohm Rosenbauer jonathan E
2018-10-12 11:48
There already is a poem about Jonathan E.
2018-10-12 12:14
This one is sick.
2018-10-12 13:03
2018-10-12 14:05
I will gladly write you a poem when I get home
2018-10-12 14:32
liTTle | 
CIS Dowa) 
lukas and jonathan in one poem
2018-10-12 13:05
2018-10-12 14:10
I bet you can make a nice poem about me, you have a lot of content only based on my flag and my name and maybe even flair.
2018-10-12 12:27
sry for bad poem men, this one was hard
2018-10-15 08:29
It's okay, i like it anyways, gracias.
2018-10-15 10:02
male, white and straight just your average user with his average baits, but he earns 32k a month and gets laid, every single day. Japan may or may not be his country of origin, he could be a fake flagger or the biggest weeb, but I don't care to what kind of videos you beat your meat, it could be real, or 2D just leave me out of it ENCE flair is less weird than it seems, it's your average alpha's favourite team, it's as ez4ence as life is for him. Astralis is also on his list he can relate, because winning is all there is and before you call him a plastic fan, who ever you are, know he doesn't care, he will find you anywhere, he's straight, male and strong, he will beat you if you say anything wrong.
2018-10-15 08:29
This is actually very good.
2018-10-15 12:46
Oh ok, thank
2018-10-15 12:47
I had to re-read this after few hours because i really liked it.
2018-10-15 12:50
xD I read all the poems every time I see them
2018-10-15 12:51
Where did your passion with this poems started?
2018-10-15 13:39
Idk men, I just read that quick poem thread someone made and I wanted to comment with a simple 4 line poem, then I just continued writing more and more and then it turned into the HLTV poem :D it was really fun, I liked so I wrote more, I have probably written like 30 poems on HLTV now, in poem challenges and sometimes I replied with poems Hltv poem in my bio btw
2018-10-15 13:49
2018-10-15 10:03
About me
2018-10-15 10:06
Still waiting
2018-10-15 13:45
There is a popular Hungarian man He can write a poem for everyone Everybody says: “ write about myself” But what about a man himself? In my opinion he deserves a poem too This is why I came here He might be in school But I want him to hear it This is hard for me to create rhymes And of course I don’t wanna tell lies I don’t know too much about this boy But I want to make him enjoy Despite numerous facts He is a great person and has a six pack Sorry for writing too much for no reason I am just a Russian peasant
2018-10-15 10:59
String theory
2018-10-15 12:53
2018-10-16 07:49
Styx | 
Turkey Styyx 
Roses are red, Violets are blue, Fuck this shit, I have no clue.
2018-10-18 17:06
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