I fell asleep yesterday, therefore I´m responding now.
Firstly, thanks for the time to respond me in this "long" way, I really appreciate it.
Secondly, yea job is kinda boring, but the thing is I dont know what really fullfil me, so Im not changing it.
To be honest, the thing I enjoy the most is bbq, I bought a new offset grill last summer, and made some fucking good briskets, ribs, wings, etc. Maybe making a foodstand is not bad idea what I think about it.
And I will definetly try out some philosophy books, do you have any recomendations ?
Lastly you said you want to be cs pro, I have been in similar situation with League of legends, before like 6years, I was very decent at it, got some offers from amateur teams (not paid at that time). I have been playing LoL for 14-16h/day...crazy amounts. Then kinda from nothing I studied abroad, and stoped playing that much.
Now I play usually just MM in cs, 3 hours a day, with my friends (IRL friends).
And good luck on that soldier path, it aint easy, for me I could not do it, because you are loosing your freedom in a way.
Anyway thanks for the responce once more.