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Why is it impossible for me to do something i dont want to do
OCEAN | 
United States KKonian 
If i dont really want to play CS but still play anyways then i will play bad every time. If i dont want to do school then i cant make myself put in effort. If my friend wants to play a game and i dont want to then i cant. Why can i not just manufacture effort to do things people dont really want to do but have to
2019-10-20 23:16
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#1
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Brazil hrp_ 
uninstall
2019-10-20 23:21
#2
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United States FarCentrist 
Its called depression.
2019-10-20 23:23
#4
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Norway JorgyZ 
Explains why 90% of people these days cry about being depressed
2019-10-20 23:23
#5
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United States FarCentrist 
Being completely unable to do simple responsible things = depression.
2019-10-20 23:25
#7
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Norway JorgyZ 
What OP is describing is a combination of lazyness and a weak mind. Im not blaming him, im slightly the same way, but its definetly not depression
2019-10-20 23:27
#9
OCEAN | 
United States KKonian 
Like my parents could never get me to do chores when i was younger. My kindergarden teacher called my mom and asked "how do you get him to do anything". Hated brushing my teeth so i would not do it every day when i was younger
2019-10-20 23:29
#14
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Norway JorgyZ 
Dude, dont tell anyone this but i literally didnt brush my teeth for a straight month when i was a kid, i obviously regret it now lol
2019-10-20 23:36
ok, i wont tell any1 men))
2019-10-20 23:46
#22
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Norway JorgyZ 
ty mens))
2019-10-20 23:47
I just called your mom because im a bad boy and betrayed you.
2019-10-21 01:54
#45
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Norway JorgyZ 
Ah dang it, i was sure i could trust hltv to keep a secret :/
2019-10-21 10:11
I'll tell you a story. I never grew up with the brushing teeth habit. My parents didnt really control if I brushed them or not they just sometimes told me to brush them but never supervised it. So I didnt brush very often at all. Then one time I went to a dentist, they had to fix 2 cavities but other than that it was okay. After this I brushed daily for a while but little by little I burshed less and less, until I ended up dropping it pretty much entirely. Years went by, including atleast a whole fricking year when I didnt brush my teeth a single time. I got to the point when I got really scared to even think about my teeth. Was scared if they got so bad that I wouldnt have any left in 5 years.. So what do I do? Avoid dentist because obviously thats really smart in that situation, right? xD After around 10 years of super bad brushing has passed from the previous dentist checkup, I go to a dentist. I was so fucking scared at this point. BUT, I got away with just 3 cavities. I was so relieved at this point. 10 years or more really occasional brushing and only 3 cavities. And now we get to the fun part: I didnt want to put myself in the same situation again and started brushing my teeth every night now that they were fine again. After a year I went to a dentist, and there were 2 cavities. I was like what the fuck is this shit? Something doesnt add up here. 10 years close to zero teeth brushing = 3 cavities 1 year brushing every day = 2 cavities. Sooo 10 years of brushing every day will grant me with 20? Makes me want to put my tinfoil hat on.
2019-10-21 01:48
Disgusting
2019-10-21 02:50
But the thing is, looking at my teeth you'd never known I barely brush them. Neither have I ever had a bad breath. So actually whats so disgusting?
2019-10-21 12:02
how do u know if u have bad breath or no
2019-10-21 12:04
For example, I've had a gf for the past 8 years. If I ask her to answer 100% truthfully, she will.
2019-10-21 12:06
what i believe is that brushing teeth doesnt really translate into having more teeth related issues, it's genetics i think, but i don't understand how can u not have smelly breath if u dont brush, im not saying its not true tho
2019-10-21 12:09
What I've heard is some people get cavities or tartar easier than others, but with brushing teeth you can still make a difference. And the difference between people is about their saliva, so genetics. I think its the same stuff with bad breath. I know people who can have extremely bad breath even tho they do brush their teeth. I've even told some people they have a bad breath and I'm pretty sure they'd call me out if I did too.
2019-10-21 12:16
#40
OCEAN | 
United States KKonian 
If the cavities were in between your teeth which i guess it would be then probably from no flossing . Then once you started brushing it pushes the food down but no flossing to make it go away
2019-10-21 02:57
It wasnt between.
2019-10-21 11:58
it's genetics mostly, let's just say that brushing ur teeth is for them to look decent and to not have smelly breath
2019-10-21 12:03
I never had neither of those issues.
2019-10-21 12:05
hard to believe
2019-10-21 12:05
Similar thing happened to me. I did get the big gingivitis though.
2019-10-21 12:32
Whats that?
2019-10-21 13:42
Infected gums
2019-10-24 15:57
+1
2019-10-20 23:30
#6
OCEAN | 
United States KKonian 
Well this is a lifelong chronic thing
2019-10-20 23:26
#3
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Norway JorgyZ 
No willpower, easy as that
2019-10-20 23:23
#13
OCEAN | 
United States KKonian 
Why not? why would i be born with zero willpower?
2019-10-20 23:34
#15
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Norway JorgyZ 
Idk, some people are born with a strong mind, some arent. Thats just how the human mind works i guess, we're all different. You can definetly improve it though, if my guessing is correct you havent really worked or done anything other than play cs go and go to school right? Well start doing something, an activity or try to do some simple work which you enjoy doing. Over time you will get more optimistic when you think about doing something
2019-10-20 23:39
#16
OCEAN | 
United States KKonian 
I stopped going to school when i was 14 and have been on the computer in my room everyday for 14 hours a day for 7 years
2019-10-20 23:40
#17
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Norway JorgyZ 
Uh huh Theres no hope :d
2019-10-20 23:41
#19
OCEAN | 
United States KKonian 
Yeah probably not. I still cant decide if there is actually something wrong with me and my brain that i was born with or what not or if its all just self inflicted and if someone who was normal was reborn into my position with my brain and all would be perfectly fine and just be a functional version of me. If you know what i mean
2019-10-20 23:44
#31
CeRq | 
Italy rad0r 
Man stop playing computer games. It’s fuckin killing you. It’s a drug. You play with no will. It’s zombie land. Please stop. Start small, restart school or join a club Do something that requires meeting people
2019-10-21 02:33
#33
OCEAN | 
United States KKonian 
I have already said i cant do school and i hate being around people and people probably dont like being around me so its a win win to not meet people
2019-10-21 02:35
#35
CeRq | 
Italy rad0r 
Ok, I understand. Then try this: start reading books. Find a path, it’s full of writers that feels the same as you. Master yourself. There is no real obligation in life. I mean, you can live the way you want. But u really want live that way? Is that affordable? Are u sure is that a free will or your will? If you want always live with ur parents till 50 yo or you are rich enough and u won’t need to work that’s fine. But if u are there, in front of a pc still missing something, feeling a bit empty etc. I think u r drugged. Instead, prove to yourself that what you want ( staying in front of pc doing nothing) is what you really want. Do something else. Do something totally opposite. Like soft air or politics ( you chose) and if you feel bad doing that ( but give them a try for real) you could always come back to your room where you will feel safe. I mean, it’s 2019. We are experiencing the first damage of the pc era. Some of us must die in fake realities lmao
2019-10-21 02:48
#18
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Serbia Duff555 
U stopped going to school after elementary school?
2019-10-20 23:44
#21
OCEAN | 
United States KKonian 
Well you move up from elementary school at like 11-12 years old
2019-10-20 23:46
#23
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Serbia Duff555 
Idk here we have 8 years elementary which u end at 14-15 and then 4 years of high school idk how is it in ur country but it seems to early to stop going to school at 14
2019-10-20 23:48
#24
OCEAN | 
United States KKonian 
Yeah it is. You have to be 18 to legally drop out
2019-10-21 00:12
Well, thats kinda bad. You really need to start doing other stuff too.
2019-10-21 02:15
#30
OCEAN | 
United States KKonian 
Its an unbreakable cycle because i dont want the outcome of doing it. I just want to sit on my computer and do nothing. I dont know why or how but thats what i can do. Also doing things are just such a long hard process that i hate doing. Go to bed at a certain time to wake up at a certain time. Shower, put on clothes, brush teeth, have to not be on the computer for however long, and be mentally prepared for whatever it is. The process of having to get ready to do things alone makes me not want to do anything
2019-10-21 02:31
same but im like this for like 3 years
2019-10-21 12:05
uninstall csgo
2019-10-20 23:27
#11
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United States 10YearBansRUs 
Well if you want to do these things but can't then its lack of willpower if its a simple task If you dont want to do these things and do them anyway expecting bad results its a bad mindset / you're retarded /close
2019-10-20 23:30
#12
OCEAN | 
United States KKonian 
Well the csgo part is kind of a bonus part. If its later in the day not really fired up to play or really feel motivated then it feels like i lose everytime and shit goes bad
2019-10-20 23:33
#25
OCEAN | 
United States KKonian 
But some things you are forced to do like going to school or work. I had a friend who also said he hated school but he was still able to put in effort and get good grades. But for me when i hate school that means i hate it and cant make myself put in effort. So if i am ever forced into doing something my effort and involvement is very low. I cant just create effort out of mid air because i want to put effort towards something. I either want to or i dont
2019-10-21 01:16
+1
2019-10-21 01:52
#46
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United States 10YearBansRUs 
Theres plenty of things in life you're going to have to do no matter what even if you hate it. Its just life
2019-10-21 10:14
#60
OCEAN | 
United States KKonian 
Welp that doesn’t work for me but good thing other people can make do
2019-10-21 15:13
#32
shox | 
Korea Jew2K 
I had exactly this last year and being very objective this was my reflection: 1. i wasnt very good at the things i am meant to do or meant to be good at, so my mind automatically tries to find a reason for this, so that it isn't sole my fault. that way, u feel less bad abt urself cuz u dont rlly have control over it - thats what u want to think 2. also, u might just want to have depression. by this i dont mean u want to be excessively sad, disinterested everyday etc, just that when someone has real depression, not 'self diagnosed' they are treated by others as a patient, like a victim of society. this is what u want. U don't want responsibility of things u are not good at, and u want peoples love care and positive attention tell u its ok. 3. also no matter what u tell urself, ur not trying 100%. u may disagree but once u get over this u will come to realization. its a placebo. it something u dont wanna do, and to justify not doing it u tell ur self that 'i have no will power and just cant do anything even if i try to if i dont want to do it'. u convince urself of smth thats not tru, because u just want an excuse. these are my thoughts
2019-10-21 02:34
#34
OCEAN | 
United States KKonian 
I think number 2 might just be a projection of you because i dont see how it would relate to me. IRL i dont want anyones attention positive or negative. I want the opposite, no attention at all. I dont know if you consider making a post on a forum that is mostly just venting as that. Its not that i think i am trying at 100%. Its that i cant make myself try because i dont want to do it
2019-10-21 02:42
Tell your parents to install punitive measures
2019-10-21 02:52
#38
OCEAN | 
United States KKonian 
But i dont want that?
2019-10-21 02:53
Do it anyways
2019-10-21 02:55
#41
OCEAN | 
United States KKonian 
But i dont want that
2019-10-21 02:59
There are different things that could be the reason: - depression - your life is too easy (not doing x,y,z has no consequences for you) - you have no discipline, directly connects to the one above - you are simply lazy but still get through life - you have no discipline, directly connects to the one above
2019-10-21 03:02
#43
OCEAN | 
United States KKonian 
Yes but im wondering why. If i was predispositioned to that like that or just a normal person who made it like that from self inflicted "mental damage" from how i act/do as a person. If its the chicken or the egg
2019-10-21 04:11
#44
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Russia RogueDecay 
I might have same shit I can earn up to lets say 100$ on my job, but I earn only 50$ or less, because once I feel that I have earned enough money to survive another month something in me is switching and my efficency drop from 80% to 10-15% and I'm starting to make excuses why I can stop working. On top of that I feel so good emotionally when I'm working at high efficency, but my brain can't recreate an artificial goal, this fucker need a real one... he wan't me to make family and work for them nonstop, and live happy slave life.
2019-10-21 04:36
minor bump i doubt it but as previous posters have said it might be the fact you could have depression? i doubt it but depression is a bad thing and some people from what i know dont even want to come to the fact they have depression. alot of people underestimate what it can do and its always worth getting it checked by a doctor my previous boyfriend had depression when i was with him but he didnt want to accept the fact that he had it tldr; see a doctor
2019-10-21 12:06
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