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Depression...
Dosia | 
Lithuania Xxx_HeartBreaker_xxX 
Yo men, it’s ya boi heatbreaker here. Nah fr, want to talk about a serious issue right now, so only serious answers allowed. I think I might be suffering from depression for a while now, like a year or so and genuinely don’t know what to do. Everything started when my girlfriend broke up with me in 2018 december. We were together for a long time, like 3years or so and she really grew on me and when we split up I was literally lost without her. I know it sounds cliche but that’s just how it is when you fall in love with somebody and don’t want to let go. Alright after we broke up, we didn’t talk, we were living our lives and stuff, we eventually blocked each other on social media’s to not get memories back, but the thing is I still remember her, I still kinda (I’m saying kinda because I know that the relationship was toxic with major red flags) want to be together with her and I just remember her, like in dreams n shit, I see her and then remember the good times that we spent together. Alright so after like 6months of literally not speaking to each other (even tho we knew what each other are doing, because we share similar friends, my friend group is often with her friend group and I still talk to this day to some of her friends, and getting snapchats and ig stories of her n shit) I decided to hit her up looking for closure (because I didn’t get any when we broke up, everything was literally out of the blues). We talked for like a hour about life, how she’s doing, how I’m doing and stuff and then talked about the relationship and yada yada yada. Then I asked do you still want to be friends, she answered no, because she asked to be friends after the split and I refused, because I couldn’t handle the heart break. That literally crippled me, I was shook, I mean I didn’t even know what I was feeling tbh, angry or chill, I was just lost. Basically here I am today, I’m doing university and my grades plummeted, my attendance is becoming horse shit, because I literally have no motivation, I’ve been having troubles sleeping, either sleeping too much or not sleeping enough, lost loads of weight, like 10-15 kilos in a year, my eating has suffered and I can’t socialise properly anymore, because I simply don’t know how to, I can’t be arsed to do my assignments because I have literally 0 motivation to do anything. Guys I really need tips what to do, this can’t go on any further, I don’t want to fuck up my life. Please hltv, help a brother in need out. Thank you
2019-11-21 16:28
Topics are hidden when running Sport mode.
Probably no one will read it:/
2019-11-21 16:43
+1 Tldr
2019-11-21 16:44
#38
 | 
Brazil EnzoAirezZ 
I did, and sadly i dont know how to help you, the best that i can think is to talk with your family and look for a professional that can help you. Even if your family dont help you, if you talk to them and they dont understand it and dont help you, i think that at least one person there will try to help you. I dont know nothing about you but its the only thing that i can say to help you. Sorry if its useless everything that i said.
2019-11-21 16:55
Nah everything’s alright, appreciate that you took the time to read it out
2019-11-21 16:57
focus on little things that make you happy :)
2019-11-21 17:39
#2
OCEAN | 
Reunion 1iquser 
go to a therapist
2019-11-21 16:44
It seems like legit no one can help, dunno maybe it’s just a mindstate but
2019-11-21 16:46
#8
OCEAN | 
Reunion 1iquser 
nah they'll help. just get a good therapist and not some fucking scammer does your campus have a therapist or nah?
2019-11-21 16:47
It does have a medical centre, but not sure about therapists, but I’m studying in the uk and they take mental health really serious so they should have something. But I’m kinda scared as well to go to a therapist not to look weak an shit you know
2019-11-21 16:49
#42
OCEAN | 
Reunion 1iquser 
bro as crazyrussianhacker once said "safety is number one priority" its better for you to be safe, than to risk your life for cool points also you'll look better in someone's eyes because you took care of yourself by trying to solve depression
2019-11-21 16:57
Might as well try it, because I legit need help to get my life together even tho I don’t want to admit it, but I have to
2019-11-21 17:18
#80
OCEAN | 
Reunion 1iquser 
yeah go and try it its the best solution
2019-11-21 17:18
#234
Rob4 | 
Serbia e_loK 
You should definitely see an expert. Some people close to me suffer from depression or other disorders and all of them have positive experiences when it comes to therapists, psychiatrists and such. Also i would suggest being more open about it with close friends and family. They should know how you feel, trust me
2019-11-21 20:15
Since you're studying in the UK I'm guessing you're here temporarily so I don't know what kind of rights you have here, but if you can, see a doctor and get diagnosed, then they can help you move past it. I feel the same as a lot of the things you wrote, just for different reasons, but I haven't made myself go in yet even though I know it will probably really help. I was going to write that you should go home over Christmas holidays, get away from your current problems and spend time with family if you have any, but remembered you've been like this for a year, so you probably already have gone home and it hasn't changed much. Still, it's probably worth a try.
2019-11-21 18:16
+1 I've been home for a bit, yeah while being back home it felt good and shit, but only for the duration I was staying home, when I came back I got myself in the same exact routine and couldn't escape it, probably if I was back in my home country none of this would have happened tbh
2019-11-21 18:18
Well if being home resets you like that, you might just have to force yourself to not fall back into it when you return. I read somewhere that having good discipline is more important than good motivation. I'm sure that if you start making yourself do your studies and assignments or whatever you're not doing right now, it will definitely be hard at first, and there isn't going to be an easy solution, but you'll probably start to feel better about yourself because you'll feel like you're making progress. But I'd still definitely recommend talking to someone, whether it's a doctor or a therapist like 1iquiser recommended, or even a friend, just to vent. I don't know if your course allows this, but it might even be worth just taking a gap year in the middle of your studies, if things get even worse over the next few months, but that's probably a last resort.
2019-11-21 18:30
Tbh I was thinking the exact thing, that I might have to put my studies on pause for a bit till I get my head back in the game. Venting to friends wouldn't help, cause most of my friends just take a piss out of depression, no one treats it as a serious thing, so maybe I'll try getting an appointment for a therapist for next week
2019-11-21 18:33
Well it kind of sucks that your friends are like that, but yeah, get that appointment, and just do whatever you feel is best for you and it'll work out eventually, even if it means putting everything on hold like that. Good luck, mate.
2019-11-21 18:42
Thanks man, appreciate it, means a lot
2019-11-21 18:44
its all about your mindset. therapist will only help you if you really want to help yourself
2019-11-21 17:39
+1
2019-11-21 18:33
#5
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United States 1for1discount 
just have to push through it like everyone else
2019-11-21 16:45
#7
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Brazil RmM_oo 
like a knife or something? I didn't got you.
2019-11-21 16:46
Nah, he’s probably suggesting just to move on and stuff
2019-11-21 16:47
#10
 | 
United States 1for1discount 
Só tenho de o ultrapassar como toda a gente.
2019-11-21 16:50
#17
 | 
Brazil RmM_oo 
Oh. Now it makes sense. Ty sry bad england.
2019-11-21 16:50
#19
 | 
United States 1for1discount 
its ok
2019-11-21 16:51
#12
 | 
Spain Minixx77 
im not reading that wtf
2019-11-21 16:49
#27
 | 
Belgium HLTVnewfag 
“Hi guys my high school love of my life broke up with me and now im a zombie” KEKW
2019-11-21 16:53
ok zombie🙈🙈🙈👶
2019-11-21 17:22
XDDD
2019-11-21 17:33
#213
steel | 
Spain Zhalos 
name doesnt check out flair does check out
2019-11-21 19:20
yesmen)
2019-11-21 20:07
get a fucking job lol, no time to be depressed
2019-11-21 16:49
I’m studying and working at the same time and I still feel depressed so
2019-11-21 16:51
drink more alcohol
2019-11-21 16:51
No time for alcohol tho
2019-11-21 16:52
hmm well if you have no time to drink how do you have time to be depressed. do you just take a moment during your work to think about how shit your life is? or is it more of a constant thing in the background?
2019-11-21 16:53
It’s just a constant thing in the background, while working, while eating food, while showering and shit, just can’t get those thoughts out of my head
2019-11-21 17:05
hmmm yeah that will take a lot of work, you need to train yourself not to keep repeating those negative thoughts. its a habit thats hard to stop. it feels really stupid but just try every time you do it, to think something positive about yourself, like that you did something useful today, finishing an assignment for school, working, having a pleasant conversation with someone, maybe you cooked something that you thought tasted nice. appreciate the little things in life. it might feel meaningless at first, but thats because youre depressed. you need to give those things meaning. its your life.
2019-11-21 17:07
And the main thing is, I can’t find motivation to do jack shit, I literally just want to stay in bed not doing anything, binge watching tv series and shit. This is really really fucking bad and I want to improve, but something is keeping me back from it, something in my brain telling me just chill relax in bed for the whole day
2019-11-21 17:21
have you considered maybe you should listen to it? if you keep going you could get a burnout. taking a break from college for half a year or a year isnt the worst thing in the world. you might need to work to make some money depending on family situation. but its alright to say you have too much on your plate right now. lots of guys i know had exactly the same problem around 20 years old including myself. its a hard time in your life, the world can seem pretty cold and hostile. youre an adult white man so you can figure everything out yourself and if you cant manage it, you can go fuck yourself for all most people care.
2019-11-21 17:27
or smoke weed erry day also you could ty mdma occasionally, or psychedelics like ayahuasca, mushrooms, maybe LSD if youre brave, every couple of months, as a form of treatment. its been shown to be quite effective at helping ppl get out of depression
2019-11-21 16:52
#107
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Russia ReaZy 
True Netherlander here
2019-11-21 17:33
also, fix your sleeping schedule, you need to know how many hours of sleep you need to perform best, and go to bed at the exact same time every day and get up at the same time every day. next step is to fix your diet, force yourself to eat a proper breakfast even if youre not hungry. you need to make sure you eat enough vegetables and fruit every day and probably take some vitamin D pills because its winter right now and lack of sunlight makes depression worse. then go outside and walk or run a couple km or go to work on your bike if possible. every day. also it probably helps to shower every day when you wake up and shave etc, looking good makes you feel better. the more structure you add to your life the easier it is to manage everything and sleeping eating and exercising regularly makes you feel better. then once you have structure and more energy you can go back out and socialize with people and hopefully get over your girlfriend and as mentioned above, meditate every day if possible
2019-11-21 17:09
#36
Gas | 
Germany Adolf_H 
so a stressfull job cant give u depression?
2019-11-21 16:55
i wouldnt get depressed from stressful job no, maybe i would get high blood pressure or get sick sometimes due to stress. or a heart attack when im 50. i get depressed from university. making useless assignments and watching teachers read stuff they copied from the book to a powerpoint slide day in day out.
2019-11-21 17:01
#70
Gas | 
Germany Adolf_H 
if your points are a reason for depression u probably never worked hard and never will. learning some stuff and listening to a teacher cause depressions lmao, if i were u the worst thing could happen will be to fall asleep. every person is different but maybe ur just an beta.
2019-11-21 17:10
well its not just that its boring. i get depressed from getting money from the government for doing nothing and learning nothing and filling out useless forms, instead of doing something useful for society and getting paid for it. its wrong. i should contribute what i can. not working makes dutch people very anxious. its not natural. now that im working full time i feel a lot better about myself. its not amazing, i still have bad days, but it sure helps to actually do something with my life.
2019-11-21 17:18
#21
MICHU | 
Poland Arknes 
just be here and now. Don't think that much about past and the future. Try to meditate everyday
2019-11-21 16:51
#23
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Belgium HLTVnewfag 
Now read your text again, conclude how silly your situation is and get your shit together
2019-11-21 16:52
#30
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Hungary mEZENCEphalon 
Concentrate on yourself. go to the gym, do your hobby, do what you always wanted to do but never did. focus on your studies. you will get better with time (especially if ur relationship was toxic) man up and dont care!! depression is for beta pussies
2019-11-21 16:54
That’s the thing, I don’t know what my hobbies are anymore, like after that shit I legit forgot my hobbies or if I’m doing something I liked before everything it doesn’t seem right, it doesn’t feel right
2019-11-21 17:32
keep searching inside your head and find something you like if you have a pet spend more time with it, if you dont have one get a puppy (if possible) or start playing music (ofc if havent played before)
2019-11-21 17:37
"depression is for beta pussies" Yeah and thanks to people like you, people with depressive disorders are never saved and end up killing themselves. A SERIOUS mental illness does not care about who you are.
2019-11-21 18:12
Well said!
2019-11-21 19:51
#31
stinx | 
Czech Republic stinx 
oh nice at least somebody else is as retarded as I am and is depressed for nothing (1st world problems), welcome brother, wanna play some cs?
2019-11-21 16:54
Yes brudda, I’ll dm you
2019-11-21 17:00
HeLlO hLtV i Am DePrEsSeD episode 5892759
2019-11-21 16:54
Huehuehue xaxaxa so funny ahahahaha
2019-11-21 16:59
not funny but rather silly and annoying
2019-11-21 17:00
People have issues and need to talk about it with at least someone and this is the best place I could do it anonymously
2019-11-21 17:08
let's go see the riders play the lakers, mang
2019-11-21 16:55
You should definitely go and get a therapist. I guess youre old enough to take antidepressants and should at least try them. they can help you to get at least a little help to sleep well and get up in the morning. you got this bro
2019-11-21 16:55
I’m 20, should be able to get antidepressants. Thanks man, appreciate it, I’ll probably try booking an appointment for a therapist
2019-11-21 17:01
imo thats like the worst thing you can do, antidepressants wont fix you or your life, they will just make you feel nothing. you can also feel good, but i wont lie, its going to be an uphill fight that will take years, so if you are content being a zombie, then you should just take the pills. lots of people are on them. millions of people, in most countries. but personally i think feeling things is kinda nice.
2019-11-21 17:03
I dont think that you have an idea of what youre talking about. I mean sure, they do have a lot of possible side effects and I am not talking about taking them for a lifetime, but as I said they can help getting you up to do something against your depression.
2019-11-21 17:37
if you quit taking the pills the mental issues are exactly where you left them so then you might as well not take them in the first place
2019-11-21 17:43
makes sense lmao
2019-11-21 18:05
so if someone is depressed or having anixeity, whats ur best advice? Im taking pills, im 100x better, i did everything job etc, and still fighting to get better whats ur opinion?
2019-11-21 18:19
well if you are taking the pills and you still feel depressed then what good are they? on the other hand if they do help you feel less depressed and you dont feel numb or unemotional when you take them then maybe you shouldnt quit. what ive heard from people i know who took pills is that they just make you feel flat, no highs or lows. and you have less energy because of them to go out and work on yourself. but i cant talk to everyone so maybe im just wrong. i never took them myself. you could try to reduce your dosing slowly and see what happens, but you have to be sure its the right time. and then actually work on your issues, so all the things i mentioned to the other guy, sleeping enough, eating healthy, having breakfast every day, exercise, meditation. you can do a lot of other things like finding new hobbies, maybe take some dance classes, join a dungeons and dragons group, join a gym or sports club, start writing articles or a blog, idk, whatever you want. and try to meet new people. to go out and do all those things, you should have a stable job and home situation, it will take a lot of effort to get out of your behaviour patterns that make you feel depressed. usually you can only do that, experiment and reinvent yourself a little bit, work on your disciplineif you can feel safe and you have a stable financial situation to put food on the table and there arent constant arguments in the house you live in. no people around giving bad examples and dragging you down. if anything goes wrong and you feel like you cant manage it, you can always start taking the pills at the normal dosage again, and maybe try again some other time. it might take a while before they start working again though, can be a couple days or weeks depending on the medication, so dont change your dosage too much, and consult your doctor about it before you do anything.
2019-11-21 18:38
#37
Aleksib | 
Europe PAAVO 
yes
2019-11-21 16:55
Don't let girls be the reason of your depression man it's just not worth
2019-11-21 16:56
#48
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Brazil EnzoAirezZ 
+1
2019-11-21 17:00
Would say +1 but it happened, now need solutions how to bounce back, forget shit and feel good again
2019-11-21 17:03
#40
allu | 
Switzerland Jeded 
If the relationship had red flags then she wasn't the one for you. Forget about her and move on with life, don't let this 1 girl hold you back
2019-11-21 16:57
Random weight loss or have u been trying or not eating enough?
2019-11-21 17:01
Not random, just not eating enough I guess, my appetite just disappeared
2019-11-21 17:02
i cant give advice mens((( im not a very serious person xD
2019-11-21 17:04
No probs man, thanks for your time
2019-11-21 17:22
#53
 | 
Europe Vallon3 
Dude... it's just a bitch. You'll find another one. Like really? This is nothing. This is what they want, for the men they leave to never recover - it makes them feel validated and special. Don't be that guy.
2019-11-21 17:01
uh i think its more about his self respect than about the girl
2019-11-21 17:05
+1
2019-11-21 17:09
pretty sure that's why your ex broke up with you, cause you are soft like a pussy. are you really that dumb to think that your first serious relationship would last you forever? maybe you also believe in fairy tales? funny thing is if you REALLY step up your life in a major way, I mean in all aspects like money, status and look wise she will be the one writing you messages and offering to meet up, but at that point you have already forgotten about her. but that takes tremendous amount of effort and why even try when you can cry on the forum and do nothing.
2019-11-21 17:02
nothing wrong with being a bit romantic my dude
2019-11-21 17:04
That’s how I was raised and I won’t take any shame in it, I was raised caring and emotional, that’s just who I am man
2019-11-21 17:13
:( very sad, but i understand You. I have depression too. I lost one girl becouse she was dead i lost second becouse of my stupid. Now i trade i make money but money is shit without girl. That's true. I will make suicide but i need only one more day. In my opinion You should go to family and talk. When You wont do it You end like me. Bye HLTV friends
2019-11-21 17:03
Man don’t let’s battle this shit together, could hop on cs or discord if you want
2019-11-21 17:14
#118
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Russia ReaZy 
Bro no, don't make a suicide mahn! You are definitelly over it!
2019-11-21 17:41
i have enough of talking. i have enough... HeartBreaker i fought 2 years i have enough.. ReaZy I am not over it. i made my decission. Suicide is only option. I have 28 YO and nothing to lose. I will leave a huge amount of money..
2019-11-21 18:08
So fight for some more time and you'll be rewarded, don't let your 2years of fighting just go away man
2019-11-21 18:16
it will go away. beleive me. in swiss we dont have problem to help with suicide and i will do it. I told myself every f******g day to fight. i dont want anymore.
2019-11-21 18:19
There is still hope in here, you should have therapists or something like that in swiss tho
2019-11-21 18:24
I was in therapists. nnothing work. You sholud go. Maybe with you can help. For me it is too late.
2019-11-21 18:26
It's never too late my man, how I think of life is "at some point there will be better times coming, just have to survive through the hard times"
2019-11-21 18:28
i dont believe in that :) Everyone wants money and i can tell i have money and i am unhappy. Do anything that makes you happy. I wont wait,
2019-11-21 18:32
Or maybe you'll find another girl that you will genuinely love and she'll make you change your mind, you just have to fight for a bit longer man
2019-11-21 18:37
Why do i have a feeling that this guy Trader1991 just messing around ?
2019-11-21 19:57
Dunno but I genuinely believe it
2019-11-21 20:50
Do you think he is okay? I feel bad for saying this?
2019-11-24 19:27
Don't even have a clue, messaged him via dms on hltv so we'll see
2019-11-24 19:35
bois...I know it`s not your fault, it`s the pharma industries "fault"... depression is a serious illness, hltv`s teenie problems != depression.
2019-11-21 17:03
Whatchu meannn
2019-11-21 17:23
#122
 | 
Russia ReaZy 
He means that depression is a serious psychological disease and that your situation is a normal life's challenge which you have to get over to proceed your life
2019-11-21 17:42
And what if I have depression but it’s not confirmed by a gp or therapist?
2019-11-21 17:45
#130
 | 
Russia ReaZy 
Well.... I suppose if you've had a real depression, you wouldn't be able to write about this on HLTV. Just do cool things, cut any things out that might recall you about her (also say your mutual friends no to remind you about her). With time you will feel better
2019-11-21 17:49
The reason for writing this to hltv is to get some advice on what to do, I’m young and I’ve never faced this type of stuff so maybe someone had a similar experience
2019-11-21 18:03
#60
LaimB | 
Lithuania Martis 
Which university? It probably offers some kind of activities for students, you can give it a shot (new people, new hobbies, also free).
2019-11-21 17:04
University of Northampton sir
2019-11-21 17:15
I'm replying half serious on this, just because I saw the word "she" included in your text. What I want to tell you is, going from the song in which Eminem said "b$#itches they come they go" that is something Not to forget about. There is no recipe for happiness. If you put more effort than her it's not gonna end well. Ye you should be the back bone of a relationship (unless you are not hetero - then the bone goes into another place), but if you are miserable, find another. Also get your priorities straight & don't let anyone ruin your balance (not even a girl). If she don't want to ride that train say "chew chew mf" and pfff pafff away.
2019-11-21 17:04
Tbh this hit me holy shit, thanks man, appreciate it
2019-11-21 17:16
(I will use the translator because the story will be long and I want to avoid as much misinterpretation as possible) I've been in your position, honestly I think you really should go to a psychologist. When I just stopped caring about everything, friendships, family, college, health, I saw that something was wrong with me. That was not me. That's when I actually met Gaulês (Brazilian Streamer) and all his struggle to overcome depression and saw that I was in the same position. I took courage and went after a psychologist with whom I had already done a job for a long time (meeting my biological mother, so I kind of prepared for each possible scenario) Am I "healed"? no ... far from it, but I'm better, definitely. I recommend that you take a look, make some consultations with various psychologists until you find one that you are really comfortable with and don't be afraid to say everything you think. I wish you all the best :)
2019-11-21 17:07
#257
 | 
Brazil EnzoAirezZ 
+1 (UH TRIBONERA UH TRIBONERA)
2019-11-22 23:08
I happened for a similar situation when my girlfriend passed away after being 6 years with her. The fact that ended like that literaly killed me inside and for a long time I felt like I had no place to go. What I did bad was to isolate myself, if I would've known that it would make things worse I would've avoided that as much as I was able to. Later, I found out that I should keep myself as busy as I could to overcome that otherwise I'd die in a slow and horrible way (I was also suffering weight loss and my brain palsy condition kinda went worse during that time). So, the thing that kept me afloat was to 'switch' the focus of my thoughts on going day by day, not just surviving but doing very very small improvements. That swich can take longer or shorter and may require help of other people (like some say in the comments, sometimes seeing a therapist can help). At some point the sum of all those small steps will build a way out for you. (._.)_b Just hold on m8 and remember that there's always someone willing to help out there!
2019-11-21 17:11
It’s kinda hard to “switch” the thoughts when they’re constantly in your head
2019-11-21 17:25
that's why I said it may take some time. I know is not like an electronic swith that makes you see the diference in less than a second, but every thing you do to overcome it, even if its for a second can lead you to a better life. I guess (._.')
2019-11-21 17:29
It’s already been a year
2019-11-21 17:30
That's something I also mentioned: ''That swich can take longer or shorter and may require help of other people''... (._.')
2019-11-21 17:33
Yeah, it’s fucking annoying tbh
2019-11-21 17:37
Exceptional advice. Hope you managed to overcome your problems or atleast made them smaller.
2019-11-21 19:33
Take some SSRI/benzoes u pussy
2019-11-21 17:12
*See a doctor, maybe he sees the need for you to take some SSRI/benzdiazepines, mate (._.')
2019-11-21 17:19
I would prefer to go without medication and shit, but if I really really need it, I’ll take it
2019-11-21 17:30
I didn't mean to reply on the thread with that comment hah, just wanted to let the guy a better way to say what he had to say to not sound like a douche at least (._.)_b
2019-11-21 17:31
ye I know man, some people here are rude af but what do you expect tbh
2019-11-21 18:14
Dude u are a bitchless cry baby, not me, I been there, just go for a solution instead of trying some “natural” methods which don’t work at all
2019-11-22 12:11
Instead of calling people bitchless cry babies, fucking help them you mong:ddd if you've been there give advice lmao, prolly ur parents didn't love you, so it's fine man
2019-11-22 12:46
Xaxaxa, my advice is to start healing yourself or with doctor’s support instead of crying, time won’t heal shit
2019-11-22 13:14
tbh what did I expect from cis XDDD
2019-11-22 13:46
Ok go fuck a pillow and cry in the corner of yo bedroom, cya
2019-11-22 15:13
I will toxic mf, but what can u do, if you're born in cis you have the toxic the genes so, sad life my man
2019-11-22 16:03
#79
 | 
Finland Homeless775 
Didn’t read but I feel you man..
2019-11-21 17:18
Thanks(?)
2019-11-21 17:24
#227
china | 
Asia Ace_Y 
+1 sad story
2019-11-21 19:51
I went through the same shit 3 years ago. Gf broke up after 5 years Depression Weight loss Bad Grades in University What helped: Write a letter about what was good and bad about the relationship Eventually come to the conclusion that you don't want her back Notice that life as single ist quite good - Invest in urself, do sport, study and enjoy it life After two years I have met my current gf and the relationship is better in every way. Probably because I have grown so much as a person in my time as a single
2019-11-21 17:20
Happiness comes in waves and the aim of the game is to ride with it.
2019-11-21 17:20
You should think about her as of a grill who doesnt care about you as much as you care about her right now. So this perfect girl is only in your head now, you love her image , not true her. I suppose she has a new boydick already and youre crying in to pillow. Sad
2019-11-21 17:22
She doesn’t lmao, but yh
2019-11-21 17:27
actually you need to move on. Take your little energy you have and go out there and find a new girlfriend. I know its hard i been there and i feel you. This shit needs a therapist its actually that bad. YOu think its nothing, but actually its pretty real. You need to focus on yourself
2019-11-21 17:23
It’s easy to say move on and shit, hard to do man, but yeah probably a appointment for a therapist wouldn’t be bad
2019-11-21 17:28
i know its really hard. I was pissed when people told me that. But really thats the only thing you can do. If you stay at home and make yourself depressed that wont help at all.First you need to remove from your life is the music you listen. I had the most depressing music playlist that i can relate to and i thought it helps me but actually it was worse. The Fake it till you make it is real. You need to fake your smile and laugh and try to be happy. It will take some time but it will be definitely easier with a therapist.
2019-11-21 17:43
Tbh that might be true, I still listen to music which reminds me her, I still have some of her playlists followed on instagram, that some times I listen to
2019-11-21 17:58
OMFG thats a lot to read. No help sry
2019-11-21 17:26
Ikr, but it’s impossible to make a tldr version of it, need to explain the whole situation to understand
2019-11-21 17:33
Just go to psyhoteraphist braliukas
2019-11-21 17:29
Probably I should
2019-11-21 17:37
mate you should post this to /r/depression, people there will actually help you out with your situation
2019-11-21 17:30
Great idea tbh
2019-11-21 17:34
gym it outta you and finnish with the steamroom, with loads of the yoga type stuff, cant sleep, gym will sort cant eat, gym will sort
2019-11-21 17:30
Tried it, but didn’t have motivation to make it a routine
2019-11-21 17:36
that's too bad, some people go through bad patches, you'll find a way , good luck
2019-11-21 17:54
Thanks man, appreciate it
2019-11-21 17:57
ion kno vrother, something like that happened to me, just try to switch mindset switch ur mindset to something like "nah fuck em hoes" i was depressed taking xans andshit for a few months but then i realized that i can get 10times hotter chicks than she was. its all about mindset. do anything u need to do but dont take eddies. gl mate edit: if anything it should help u to be a better person for me it helped a lot i started doing reaaaaal good in life got em cash and stuff cus i was like imma show this bih whats up so i wanted to flex on sm and stuff and now, life is good and she hit me up a year after the breakup or so lmao
2019-11-21 17:36
Maybe that works, but I just need to find motivation and it's so hard to find for me right now
2019-11-21 18:13
ur motivation can be making her regret what she did. im sure u gon be alright gl man
2019-11-21 18:57
Thanks man, appreciate your advice really really much, you too, be safe g
2019-11-21 18:59
I don't really know but I hope that you will bounce back :( <3
2019-11-21 17:38
Thank you man, appreciate it
2019-11-21 17:42
Teenage depression isn't real, stop feeling sorry for yourselves kids and grow up, you are not the center of the universe and nobody cares about your irrelevant problems.
2019-11-21 17:42
Teenage? I’m a young adult sir, I’m 20 Edit: yeah no one cares about it, but still there are people who had similar experiences and try to help
2019-11-21 17:43
Exactly, and instead of enjoying life you are so obsessed with yourself you made up a mental illness just to other people would feel sorry for you, you even share your pathetic story with a gaming internet forum. Real depression is when people fail to see meaning in life over a loss of their family members or something equally as serious, surely not because you're a beta male and weren't able to hold on to a chick you liked.
2019-11-21 17:44
Are you delusional or what, there are more factors of how I’m feeling right now, I’m studying far from home, I see my family and friends once a year and shit. Btw read it again, “ I THINK I MIGHT be suffering from depression for a while now “ I’m not saying that in fact I suffer from depression lmao, I may or may not be suffering from it, it needs to be diagnosed at first. I’m just asking for advice. And btw read a proper medical overview of depression, cos your understanding is quite slim nhs.uk/conditions/clinical-depression/
2019-11-21 17:54
getting depressed because of girls. youre a weakling and thats maybe why she left you.
2019-11-21 17:44
Nah, it wasn’t because of that, it was because of distance and shit, but nt swedistan
2019-11-21 17:55
Just stop being sad lmao
2019-11-21 17:44
XDDDDD
2019-11-21 17:54
so ez
2019-11-21 17:59
train your thighs and bum like walking up and down stairs a lot and they will literally produce anti depressants it will also improve your memory and decision making. its what kept us going thousands of years. life hack the pharmacy dont want you to know
2019-11-21 17:51
XDDD
2019-11-21 19:27
#135
NiKo | 
Australia nikofan 
Not really the right place to seek help but.. I guess play counterstrike ? Or watch counterstrike ??? There must be a reason why you are on this forum !! REMEMBER !! It's COUNTERSTRIKE !!
2019-11-21 17:56
I do watch it, don’t play it anymore tbh, but I’m coaching a league of legends team and quite into esports in general, that’s literally the only hobby I still have left tbh
2019-11-21 17:59
tldr
2019-11-21 17:59
You need to take time to read it, to understand the whole situation if you have time
2019-11-21 18:00
I will
2019-11-21 18:01
Thank you
2019-11-21 18:11
HLTVbrotip: go to the gym. Even if at first you have no motivation. The first thing is that you improve your self esteem. Together, go psychological help. No psychiatric treatments, I'm talking about psychologists. Let off steam, exposing your feelings to an expert is the best solution. Don't blame yourself for her not wanting your friendship now. The world has over 7 billion people and you will surely find someone who makes you feel something even crazier than she makes you feel. Own experience. I broke up a relationship of 7 and a half years. I speak with property. I thought my world was going to end, I had no ground and no life north for almost two years.
2019-11-21 18:21
I went to the gym already, but quit it because I couldn't be arsed to go to it every day or so, just no motivation, even tho I like sports and physical activity. It's been a year already, probably I just need more time. And yeah I think I'll get an appointment for a therapist or something for next week, thank you, appreciate it man
2019-11-21 18:27
#143
rko | 
Saudi Arabia WWF 
Don't be sad. She would not stay forever
2019-11-21 18:01
Ye man
2019-11-21 19:27
#145
who | 
Other Unterzee 
Good read 👍
2019-11-21 18:03
+1
2019-11-21 18:12
#146
 | 
France legendQa 
ohh i can feel you, i'm having the same mood, kinda... Still searching solutions too
2019-11-21 18:05
That's the thing it's kinda hard to find solutions on your own
2019-11-21 18:12
u shoud watch fight club ( im still depressed cuz my life is shit , but right now i much more stronger)
2019-11-21 18:15
I've seen it already tbh
2019-11-21 19:19
Than u didnt understand it
2019-11-22 09:05
I don't want to be a fucking idiot but... depending on how you are, you may never recover and get over it. How long ago was it?
2019-11-21 18:15
About a year ago
2019-11-21 18:19
You must realize that it wasn't meant to be. It's nothing wrong with you, nor with her. It's just that some pieces aren't meant to stick together long enough and will eventually break. You're focusing on the good moments spent with her because somewhere in your subconscious you believe you'll never find someone like her and be happy. That's the biggest mistake you can make. There are plenty of girls out there which can fit better with you than she has. It's hard to get past a relationship, it requires a lot of work and a lot of self-reflection. You need to sit down with yourself and realize where things went wrong, learn from them and become a better version of yourself. By better I mean your genuine, true self. Be self confident, you'll do fine even without her. Go out there, do your thing, meet new people, girls and see where you're at. Be mindful to not look in other girls what you looked for when you were with your ex. There's a reason why it didn't work out in the first place. Start working out, do meditation, gain self-confidence, find hobbies that you like and go with the flow. Living is beautiful and it's a journey with ups and downs. It doesn't resume to just a relationship. Eventually someone will pop up in your life who will make you truly happy. The secret is not to search for it, but instead be open and raise up to the occasion whenever the opportunity arrives.
2019-11-21 18:20
Kinda felt what you've said, I've done loads of self reflection and reflected on the relationship as well. But that's the issue I don't have motivation to do all of that stuff, that's the main problem about this.
2019-11-21 18:22
Like I said it's not easy getting out of a shit hole. I've been there. I'm struggling as we speak to find motivation to go workout. But I'll do it because I know how good it feels when you've climbed out of that hole. A person who wasn't there can't possibly know. It's like a friend of mine who went from being a rich boy to homeless. After he managed to struggle with it he appreciated life more than most of the people from this planet. You just have to break your routine. In this life especially mentality it's all about routine and patterns of thinking. If you want to workout, find your anger inside of you and just do your fucking thing. Regarding meditation, you have no excuse. It's all about laying down and clearing your thoughts for half an hour. Everyone is battling their own demons, and this is your battle. Just make a choice, build day by day and I GUARANTEE you will get past it. Motivation comes all from the brain. Don't let your brain control you, show him who's the boss.
2019-11-21 18:33
This hit my like a tow truck tbh, thank you man for helping, I'll try my hardest to get into that state of mind and start doing shit, not just laying in bed thinking bout bad shit that's happening in my life. I really appreciate the time you put in this, big thanks to you man.
2019-11-21 18:35
Don't worry bro, glad to help. Remember the sensation you're feeling now as that's what motivation is. You might or not lose it in a while but don't despair, it's something that doesn't fix overnight. Be strong and enjoy life as much as you can. If you're having issues and whatnot, you send a PM anytime. Tips from other people helped me tremendously when I was struggling.
2019-11-21 18:44
Like today the mood is that I want to fucking cry by reading all of these comments, there are true people who just want to help you out, I didn't expect so many genuine people on hltv tbh, but you proven me wrong, literally I'm so grateful for your time and advice man
2019-11-21 18:53
#216
 | 
France legendQa 
Thanks aswell, hit me up too
2019-11-21 19:27
+1
2019-11-21 18:23
We all have depression man. It's just how we handle it that makes the different. After my gf left me, i share all my feeling to my friend. My friend she isnt worth it for me. So i made up my mind to think she's just a whore and didnt deserve me. Need almost 1 year to compeletely forgot about her. Tl:dr : Just share your feeling with someone you know will understand and made up your mind to be better.
2019-11-21 18:22
I've tried speaking to other people about it as well, but that just doesn't help for me at least
2019-11-21 18:23
#173
 | 
Serbia TheSerb 
Man find a hobby, keep your mind busy. My gf broke up with me like a month ago + and i was super sad becouse it was out of the bloom and she had no real reason but i go to the university and work at a gym and also workout alot so i dont think about her. Start hitting the gym with a friend and keep doing your school becouse its more important than she is. She is lost dont lose your future man. Stay strong!
2019-11-21 18:29
Thank you man, appreciate it
2019-11-21 18:38
#189
 | 
Serbia TheSerb 
People asked me why i still have pictures on my phone with my ex. I allways say becouse i enjoyed the time and i dont want to forget it, but it doesnt make me feel depressed becouse i keep my mind busy. We also hanged out and i dont think i feel anything to her. Just be strong and keep hustling
2019-11-21 18:40
I still have some photos of my ex on my laptop, but don't look at it, it's just chillin in my hard drive, but if I see her I would even get worse tbh, that's why I try to zone myself out from her even tho I still listen to music that reminds me her, but I genuinely like the music tho
2019-11-21 18:41
#195
 | 
Serbia TheSerb 
No point in getting depressed just get over it. Hit the gym thsts a start
2019-11-21 18:44
Yeah, I'm trying my hardest, but with no succession, but maybe I just need time
2019-11-21 19:19
#228
 | 
Serbia TheSerb 
Ofc time
2019-11-21 19:53
well that obviously sucks bro, usually all you need is time and distraction. Dont think about her too much. Look for other girls, friends, activity. If you keep thinking about something and there is nothing you can do, you might get depressed because you are feeling helpless. My advice is to just look for distraction, have good times with your friends and move on to another girl that actually suits you and deserves your love. Actually it was better for you that she rejected your offer to be friends again.
2019-11-21 18:30
Probably yeah, because if we were friends the memories and shit would continue and wouldn't end so
2019-11-21 18:40
Just move on like an alpha men. Remember that your life is more important than her.
2019-11-21 18:31
Yeah, you have to be at least a bit selfish at some times
2019-11-21 18:44
#181
 | 
Poland Ryunar 
You have to first be honest with yourself. Criticize yourself to find out if you are chasing after her merely because you miss sex. From there you have two answers: 1. If yes, you are merely longing after her because of missing sex, then consider what she is actually worth if sex were taken out of the equation. 1a. If you find that she would mean little if sex were not considered, i.e. she is not inherently intelligent, emotionally connective, or interesting, then you will realize that you are justified to simply move on. Furthermore, you need to realize that your problem in this is from you not disciplining yourself. 1b. If you find that she has altruistic qualities that are important to you far past just sex, then you need to not be a cuck saying 'let's be friends." You have to go back after her and double down. Show that you really do car and why you care, why she is important and realize you are justified in doing so. 2. If no, you are missing her for many reasons that aren't sex, then 1b should be your answer. However, don't let the good times of 2016-2018 cloud your judgement. It is easy to think that since those times were so good, it is because of her. But in reality they were good because you were seeking out a new life as a young person and she was there. Dont think that having her back will bring those good times back. You have to seek the good times now like you did when you were a teenager.
2019-11-21 18:34
Yeah probably this might be true, the answer is 1b, but I tried going back after her, but no luck, she kept rejecting me, even tho she felt a lot for me, but she just couldn't do it any more. But the fact is that right now she even feels a lot towards me (that's what I heard from her friends), but needs time to get shit straight. And the last paragraph was literally the whole thing, like I grew with her into a young adult and maybe that's why I'm so attached
2019-11-21 18:49
#245
 | 
Poland Ryunar 
So why did you got back to her asking to be friends? Unless that is what you call trying to get back together..
2019-11-22 04:36
I know that everybody's gonna tell you to hang out with your friends and that kind of stuff, but man, that's life, happened to me some time ago, we were together for 3 years as well. At the beggining it was very hard to do something without remembering her, but you will eventually get better, you just need to stay occupied and focused. As you said, it was a toxic relationship, so why don't you recognize that staying without her is better for YOU? You deserve something better man, just keep your dreams alive and learn from everything that took you to this situation.
2019-11-21 18:36
Because that's me, I care more for other people than I care for myself, I need to improve on that aspect
2019-11-21 18:51
Brother, trust me, you will get better every day that passes
2019-11-21 19:55
#187
 | 
Brazil lul321 
Hi, idk if you gonna ready this or anyone had said the same stuff but, first you gotta look for help, find a therapist if you can afford, if you can't, try to change your habits, eat healthier and do some kind of exercise, u can start with a walk and then start running etc, go to gym, try to learn something new, like a new language etc
2019-11-21 18:38
That's the thing, I would want to do those things, like learning or exercising, but I literally have 0 motivation for it
2019-11-21 18:50
#202
 | 
Brazil lul321 
Don't you have any friends that can start to do this kind of stuff with you? like gym? You should take the first step, usually is the hardest one but once you make it, it will be easy to do a lot of new stuff, love yourself
2019-11-21 18:53
I'm studying in another country, so my best friends mostly are back in my home country, here I have some friends, but they're not that special and stuff you know what I mean, but at least right now I have one friend who I've known for 6years come to study in the same town as me, so at least this thing is kinda good
2019-11-21 18:55
#207
 | 
Brazil lul321 
Since you are in a different country, probably you can go for a walk and get to know a lot of new places, enjoy yourself, like your own company, when i ended my first 2 year relationship i was dead inside with any hope, but time heals things and you will learn a lot from it. You should love yourself first before try another love, just take your time, you need it and deserve it, don't rush things, and go for the first step, just a walk and eat healthier, you will see the difference
2019-11-21 19:00
I've done that already, know the place and stuff. But yeah I probably just need time and a professionals advice as well, thank you man, appreciate it
2019-11-21 19:18
stay strong mate- better days inc
2019-11-21 18:41
Thanks man, hopefully
2019-11-21 19:01
i believe in you. take your time. you will be stronger one day
2019-11-21 19:42
I appreciate that so much man
2019-11-21 20:49
You should move to finland. Here everyone is depressed so you will fit in perfectly
2019-11-21 18:44
#198
JW | 
Sweden gNeJS 
I understand you even tho it has never been that bad for myself. Dont be so hard on your self, your going to university you look good enough to get girls (obv). You have many things to be grateful for even tho its hard to see. Try to think that it will be a little little bit better tomorrow and that tomorrow your one day closer to feeling good again. You might not be happy tomorrow, but it will be a little little bit better than yesterday and its the progress that matters. Im cheering for you.
2019-11-21 18:48
That's the only thing, it might be better, the word MIGHT is so fucking annoying
2019-11-21 19:01
#239
JW | 
Sweden gNeJS 
It will get better friend, but i cant tell u when, but tomorrow you will be one day closer to that day. You will get thrue this, i know it.
2019-11-22 01:31
Hopefully, thank you, appreciate it man
2019-11-22 01:41
depression is mostly just a sign that ur moving in the wrong direction. i spent 25 years living my life for other ppl. make my parents proud, fit into society but i never really had my own will do create something until i actually did. now i do skateboard/snowboard workshops with kids and my life was never better. my paycheck might not be a lot but it hardly feels like work for me.
2019-11-21 19:32
#219
 | 
Greece deSTI_ 
i arent read that
2019-11-21 19:38
Yo u will go trough these i trust u, just need to know its not gonna happen today or this week it takes time but i recommend u to think about the opportunities u have in life in comparasion to lots of people that don’t and also to have a mindset of knowing that the times the bad stuff happens it will be for u to think about it, reorganize and u will get new opportunities and more valuable ones than the one uve been through, just need to make sure of that.. u are being prepared 4 a new chapter of ur life that requieres u to go through some rough stuff first and use that to then understand life
2019-11-21 19:39
Just found out about depression, man that sucks haha
2019-11-21 19:40
go to south africa for half a year, i will asure u, no more depression ever in ur life. we'Re living in luxery compared to these fellas over there.
2019-11-21 19:40
#223
 | 
Croatia feelsbadmane 
Stopped reading at girlfriend....stop being so ordinary set your life goals to be most sucessfull u can be....1st get sucessful financial independancy then after u can focus on girlfriend wife kids what "normal" ppl do.....PUSH TO YOUR LIMITS!
2019-11-21 19:41
Just focus on whats good in life men, and think about what your complaining about you have everything in your hands right now. Yu study and work, you know whats best for yourself right? Go work out and use traning as a way of getting your thoughts on something else, i feel with you. Recently been thru some of the same things. Just keep your head up, work towards what you want , trust yourself and love the once around you. Hope you fix your promblem and that this helped you. <3( no homo but still)
2019-11-21 19:49
#231
 | 
Brazil renatorib 
I know it's much easier to speak than do, but you REALLY need to look for a therapist. I know you will discredit at first, but it will help you. Therapy works and needs to be demystified.
2019-11-21 19:59
+10000
2019-11-21 20:19
It must be really hard but you can't stay forever on this bro. Don't be sad it's gone be happy it happened. Take yourself back in hands , clear your mind by sports (I do swim it just helps me thinking about other stuff that daily routine) Idk if u smoke or drink but tbh I reduced them all as I also reduced my cs playtime to focus more on studies. First get ok with yourself , sports, find new goals (very important, mentally and physically) Then go back to socialise (when you have such hard times friends is often a good key to move on, just so things you like) Also go and enjoy with your family , when ur in a relationship you kind of take them away :/ ) Also don't forget that being single has alot of good points; you're free. Once you will be good with yourself again, just go and hangout with as much girls as you feel! Hope I helped u , I had a very long time with a hard depression and I really hope I can help bros who need over me, cya man gl with your life:)
2019-11-21 20:05
Thanks man, appreciate it so hard
2019-11-22 16:06
Buddy, to forget it, you need to radically change your life.Do any sport, communicate more with friends from the University, attend various events, meet new people, read various literature, especially motivational, stop communicating with her friends, stop visiting the places where you were together, limit your time in her circle and spend more time with your friends, you can even talk to loved ones about it, they will tell you exactly what to do.In General-do not be driven, you will be fine further in life, you are young, you have where to direct your potential, and what about studies-this is a great reason to forget it and for this you need to fully immerse yourself in it, to study those topics that you do not know well or do not know at all.In General, we are all with you, do not despair and smile more c:
2019-11-21 23:17
be my friend.Great day :brazilflag: :thumbsup:
2019-11-22 01:51
I am your friend :thumbsup:
2019-11-22 16:06
#242
 | 
Brazil jRuskov 
Well, i read it, i suggest you to try to talk with any closer/trustable friend, and open yourself, i know it is hard, but don't need to be a person who live near you, or is you local-friend, idk, we are in hltv probably u have a duo who play csgo with u from any other place, any discord friend from another place, try to talk with someone, i know i'm not helping so much, but if u want add me on discord, we can talk about it joão#4080
2019-11-22 02:00
#243
fer | 
Brazil madrid_ 
man, snap out of it, you have splitted, she's moved and you should too. let the past in the past and don't let it ruin your present and your future! there's still plenty of people that love you and will support you, live your present life and stop trying to live in your old one. you are special and nothing, nothing in the world will ever take that away from you, so do your thing, take a day off to think, a week, maybe a month, decide what you have to do, discover new stuff, meet someone new. give it your best shot. and the girl, try talking to her, say that you regret and how you felt at the moment, air things out with her, don't let all this weight in your chest. do this, you will move on and be happy, life is composed out of good and bad moments, it's basically a law, but you, you decide which moment you wanna "live" the most of.
2019-11-22 02:02
#244
 | 
Korea OKOptimistic 
I use to be in the same situation when it comes to the depression: eating, sleeping, anti-social, loss of confidence stuff. Idk what to say just simply to take care of your lifestyle. Healthy diet, 8 hr. sleep, go to the gym, talk to a therapist these are all the things to help you destress. And maybe try and stay away from distractions on the Internet like tv and video games (especially porn) cause they fill your mind with useless information and joy. Focus on yourself and yourself only, try to get a job do well in school then hopefully someday down the road when you have regained your confidence you will find another girl. But before anything your priority is helping yourself and yourself only.
2019-11-22 02:12
tldr
2019-11-22 12:47
Cba to read this mens.
2019-11-22 12:50
#258
 | 
Europe letqpena 
Keep yourself busy and do shit you actually enjoy for a while to stay away from dark shit you might think about once in a while. Just find some purpose. After a while, you'll find a new gf as well and everything you've endured is just some hazy memory.
2019-11-22 23:13
#259
 | 
Brazil Eneas56 
Seek for professional help and tell EVERYTHING to the specialist, it has already taken time enough, you must do it NOW.
2019-11-22 23:20
I feel with you. A friend got dumped by his gf 2 years ago. Nothing close to closure. She just blocked him everywhere. All her friends were asses to him. Worse, he started studying abroad shortly after, so no family, friends or motivation... He started taking harder drugs and his studies obviously suffered. Gaming all day and sweltering in his own misery. Sadly I didn't know and had poeblems of my own, so I couldn't support him. The thing is, friends are important in these situations, to give you some fun and so on. Talk to your best friends about this, and ask them to talk to you often enough. This helps a lot. But the most important thing is that you find something to do for yourself. Do a Teamsport or so and grind it. Get better and focus. There you can get your motivation to study. There you have to build yourself a new life. Everybody copes with things differently, so you will need to figure out what you do on your own, but just start to figure. That's the key.
2019-11-24 19:39
18:00Sons Of Lennart vs fightclub
Sons Of Lennart
2.06
fightclub
1.72
15:30GODSENT vs Illuminar
GODSENT
1.51
Illuminar
2.50
14:00AVANGAR vs mousesports
AVANGAR
2.60
mousesports
1.55
Bet
Return
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