I have pretty low social skills and if there is such an opportunity to not to talk to people i always stick to that, i am even scared to talk to my own sister, simply trying to avoid conversation when she initiate it. To achieve something big and great in this life i need to change the way of live i am living - being more socialized, talk to people, to have desire to learn something and expand my hobbies exactly for that purposes, to talk to people.
The only thing i do is sitting home for 24/7 lurking threads on hltv, checking my recommendation page on YouTube and playing games. I kinda depressed that in moment i have had everything - i was studying in uni, had 2 friends, even tho i have not seen them after school, i was feeling my parents support. Almost every night i blame myself for what i have become and honestly i should have killed myself 3 years earlier. Even if there is an opportunity to change my life for better, i dont want to do anything, i accepted my fate and my place in this life.