I sexually Identify as a Hit Disney Chanel Original Movie. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of having a beautiful, whitewashed cast with one black guy and one Asian. People say to me that being both a Disney Channel Original Movie and a "hit" is Impossible and I'm stupid but I don't care, I'm beautiful. I'm having a plastic surgeon install crappy writing and the same four chords on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me DCOM and respect my right to make the same movie over and over again. If you can't accept me you're a disneyphobe and need to check your cinimatic privilege. Thank you for being so understanding.